IMNOT2BZY

Still here

2012-01-01T18:29:00.000-05:00

I'm still here..Just busy busy. Oops guess that goes against my blog title.

So what have I been up to lately?

I am still with Bubba. 15th of Jan. will mark 1 Yr and 2 months. Was just this past Friday he said I love you for the first time. I was so relieved, I had been wanting to say it myself for awhile. Eventually told myself I wasn't going to say it until he did or unless I accidentally, well more like naturally just blurted it out one day. Feels great to get that kind of confirmation on someones feelings and where we are at thus far.

Just here recently I received my T-shirt from LT-Shirt Company. I managed to take a few pictures before batteries went dead on camera and also they went dead before I had a good chance to figure out how to place the camera so ALL of me was included. I have yet to take any more.

The reason behind picking this shirt was because, "Woof!" is what I say to Bubba all the time. He's always like "RAWR!" and flexing his arms at me and I reply back with "Woof!". So it's fun and cute :) Thank you Tony. (The Third Leg)

Another thing I have been busy with is designing a website for an Actor a friend of mine introduced me too. He was needing a website and my friend thought I was a good choice. Granted I have a bit of knowledge doing that but have never done it for anyone but myself.

His name is Brad Potts, some of you might know him from the latest Dish Network/Blockbuster commercial. He comes in at the END in the GIANT cowboy hat.

He is also the Sargent in most of the Advert commercials for Skysport Rugby World Cup 2011.

Also he was in the movie "Water for Elephants" played the strongman in the Circus.

I have almost completed his website, he is a busy guy so working around his schedule when he is free to be able to get the stuff I need for content to finish it. As of Saturday I have the rest of the stuff I need to go ahead and finish it, so that project will be done soon.

Another thing that is coming up in the next couple of days is THE BIG DENTAL appointment. This has been years in waiting, finally going to be done. I will have
a new bridge for my front teeth. I am anxious, nervous and excited all at the same time for a new smile. Of course the first bridge is just a temporary, won't be until March I will get the permanent one put in.

The Falling Leaves

2011-10-11T05:51:00.004-04:00

<br><br>I <br>

I was chatting with Bubba a couple weeks back, we chat on yahoo when we are apart.

He was being quiet. I asked him what he was reading or watching. I always suspect he is either reading news articles, watching aviation videos or studying when he is quiet.

He shared this with me, something I have not heard before. I told him, "You just showed me a side of you I hadn't seen before, Thank you. Now I really miss you".

We say that a lot when it has been awhile since seeing each other. Either it be via text or yahoo. It's always, I Miss you...Missing you....Can't wait to see you...Right after we part it is...Missing you already.

I just saw him yesterday and yes, I miss him already.

Bitch is Crazy

2011-08-20T02:57:00.001-04:00

Okay I have never been one to post about politics or religion. Mostly cause I see my blog as a conversation. Politics and religion are what I myself see as conversation faux pas.

So all I got to say is:

Is this BITCH FOR REAL? I'm sorry but "IF" I was on this woman's team, I would be yanking her silly ass off the train! Bitch you are making us look bad!!

BACHMANN FLUB

BACHMANN: Gay Families Are Not "Families"

Okay so those were just a few links of interest. I thought Palin was an idiot. This lady takes the cake. Sad thing is, other idiots out there that will vote for this woman. That is a scary thought.

This train wreck is funny to watch though :) In words of Kathy Griffin: Gurrl Down!

Culinary Boner

2011-08-13T02:44:00.000-04:00

Been awhile since I posted anything new. I've been kind of caught up in playing pool and working my "Culinary Boner".

So as of lately, I have rediscovered my inner "Foodie". I've have always known I enjoyed cooking. Actually, I started out baking. I was around 16 and living with my mother and step father. I had already mastered the pool table that we owned and got bored at night. So I picked up baking. I don't do so much baking these days. I never was much of a sweet eater. I will still make the occasional pie, cake or batch of cookies.

I enjoy the cooking, but what really is exciting for me is cooking for someone else. I LOVE a man with an appetite and LOVE that Bubba has one. In all my relationships I've never really been with anyone that enjoyed food. In my last relationship I'm not even sure I got to show off my cooking ability to its full extent.

Since I've been with Bubba, (going on 9 months now) he wants me to cook for him. How exciting and sexy. Let me tell you, Muscle Daddy LOVES to eat! Not only that, he thoroughly loves it if I feed it to him and/or rub his belly while he eats. I highly enjoy seeing him content and happy with food that I have cooked. I'm just getting started in this process so what I have cooked for him so far has been limited. He has a healthy appetite, ( Big Boy needs to EAT!) plus it turns him on to have a full belly. Honestly, it gets my libido going to see how much he loves it. I get the reward of seeing him totally enjoy the food and that he wants to pounce on me right there bent over the kitchen table. LOL

I have fed him a few times, it is definitely erotic for me. So far to date, the glazed donuts have got to be my favorite. LOL I brought him donuts one morning, feeding him glazed donuts in bed and then having him lick and suck the glaze off my fingers...BOING! - BONER! I'm most certain there are going to be more favorites to come.

Being with him on this level has awakened this part of me that has laid dormant for quite awhile. We are so in tune with each other on so many levels. I find it very bonding, sexy, playful and exciting.

The cooking, eating and feeding is just one aspect of it all. There is still the contrast in body size, which physically and erotically is off the charts. We're talking about 230 lbs. of meat hovering, grunting and growling over 110 pounds, wanting to sexually eat it! Then there is the whole dynamic of personality and our treatment towards one another. Not sure I can cover all the words to describe that!

Belly rubs Bubba ;)

Sunday Pool

2011-05-03T08:06:00.000-04:00

So pretty much EVERY Sunday night I am out attending a Pool Tournament. Well apparently, there was Paparazzi this time, taking photos for Facebook.

I knew I should have worn my contacts on Sunday!

As you can see the only time I wasn't holding my phone was when I was holding a pool cue. Oh wait, that one picture...Never mind I'm probably still holding it just can't see it. FRIENDS were trying to take my phone away that night...Back OFF! I'm texting Bubba! :P

How Great Thou Art

2011-04-23T23:00:00.000-04:00

I watched this last night. Best performance of the night!

WS @ the 5

2011-04-22T23:38:00.000-04:00

Couple weeks back, Brian a friend of mine asked if I read the sign in the bathroom at the 501. NO-I haven't been in there lately. Actually, it might have been there for awhile I just probably didn't notice it.

This last Wednesday I managed to get a shot of it. Thought I would share.
(click to enlarge)

If you are having a hard time reading this image. The sign says:

Please Don't piss on the floor! Please! If you do need to be pissed on (And it's ok) Just be considerate of the bar and other customer's, and lick it up off the floor. Or see your friendly security person and ask for a towel. Thanks so much!

I myself don't partake in this action. I have never witnessed it either. However, I do know it does happen, among other things. LOL

BzyBits

2011-04-17T01:07:00.003-04:00

So I started a photo blog on Tumblr. It is not necessarily going to be pics of myself. Even though I have oodles of pictures of myself. I have collected quite a bit of pics from the net that got my attention :P and I will just share them on Tumblr.

My first post however is a photo of myself. Next one will be a taste of something else. Oh and this site will be NSFW!!

http://bzybits.tumblr.com

**I got rid of this Blog :( **

Sleepy Time Perv - Repost

2011-04-09T20:44:00.002-04:00

Sleepy-time Perv!

I've always had a problem going to sleep at night. I can't seem to shut things down and actually close my eyes and fall asleep. I could be drop dead tired and still, my brain would be working.

I lay down and close my eyes, and I begin to go back thru my day. I think about what I said, what I did, what I could have said or what I should have said. I also think about things I have to do the next day.

When I actually take my butt to bed, I will lay there for a good hour or two. Then it just gets later and later. Then I look at the time and get all anxious and paranoid cause I'm not going to get enough sleep. Then the pressure starts that I really need to get to sleep. Forcing it doesn't help, it makes matters worse. Then I get restless.

I've had some people tell me, that I need to visualize myself someplace. Like the beach or on vacation. How can I visualize something I have never done before or seen? That or just concentrate on the blackness. I can't seem to do that.

The only thing that seems to work half of the time is, I will just lay there and think about a sex fantasy. I try to concentrate on the details. How it would smell, the colors, the texture of things around me, the dialog, the sensations. Then my mind just seems to get lost in it and eventually, my inner eye seems to drift off in a haze and finally I am asleep. Horny, but asleep.

There is the typical guy thing, I could just jack off. Sometimes that helps me fall asleep. In most cases, usually not. After the throbbing settles down, I have to get up and go piss. Then after the trip back from the bathroom I am more awake. Then I feel I need a quick snack, then I need something to drink. Then I am back down again, but then by the time I get ready to doze off and things have faded to the back ground, I have to piss cause of the drink I had with my snack! Damn it, damn it to hell! I need a man in my bed to physically & sexually wear me out, so I can go to sleep at night!

I posted this again or bringing it back to the top because it really is a revolving issue for me. My sleep pattern is always out of whack cause of not being able to shut my brain off.

I will say though, "Liquid Mind" is nice to listen too at low levels when going to bed. I got introduced to it by Bubba when we would head to bed. Granted it does help me relax and sleep. But, it also makes me horny and miss Bubba when I haven't seen him in awhile.

Someone Like You

2011-03-31T12:58:00.000-04:00

Property of Bubba

2011-03-07T09:39:00.000-05:00

Somewhere on that list of the 30+ challenge was a question about what was your last item purchase. Of course that was much farther down the list. (I stopped at 30 days)

My most recent purchase was a shirt that I have been contemplating for quite awhile. I just couldn't make up my mind what I wanted on the front.(So many choices)

I finally went with "Property of XXL Bubba" I've actually had the shirt for some time now, but I wanted Bubba to see it first before I displayed pictures of it here. He actually saw the pictures first, before seeing it in person. Which is not what I planned, but he couldn't wait! lol

He loves the shirt. I like it as well and how it fits. I like the style of it too.

Big Fuckin' Cotton Boner

2011-03-05T06:15:00.000-05:00

Thank you Tony for sharing this with me. Frickin' HILARIOUS!!

Bad Teacher

2011-02-28T02:35:00.001-05:00

I can't WAIT for this!!

A Youtube Video

2011-02-27T23:58:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge. (Ending) But still might pull some from the list somewhere down the road.

Day 30: A Youtube.

There is so many to choose from that I have watched. Decided I was gonna stop stressing over finding the RIGHT one. I have posted several Youtube videos here.

Here is a performance of Adele - Someone Like You.

"Nevermind, I'll find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you.
Don't forget me, I beg, I remember you said:-
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead"

A Website

2011-02-26T19:47:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 29: A Website.

Gosh, so many to choose from. I know I didn't want to go with porn! I've already listed a few of those anyway.

So I am going with this one: http://eztv.it

If you know how to use a torrent program, this is a nice place to download any TV series or program that you can probably think of. I am a fan of "The Mentalist" and sometimes I miss a few of them. So this is where I get my back episodes, so I can get caught up.

A Recipe

2011-02-25T19:03:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 28: A Recipe.

I'm going to cop out on this one, mostly cause all my recipe's are still packed away after the move. Which eventually I do have to dig out, cause I promised Bubba I would cook for him.

I eat oatmeal for breakfast A LOT! Plus, I do like oatmeal cookies, as long as they are soft.

So we'll let Mr. Tony share a cookie recipe with ya. It's a guaranteed pleasure of a read.

A Recipe!

Talent and Hobby

2011-02-24T16:29:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 26. A Talent of Mine.
Day 27. A Hobby of Mine.

Well from my last post I think you can pretty much guess what my talent is. That's if you would consider it a talent. I draw and paint, etc. Just something that I naturally picked up. Of course I've had some learning to do along the way. That's why I am not sure it's considered a talent. Talent to me is something that you are born with, like a good singing voice or dancing perhaps.

Drawing and whatnot could also be considered my hobby as well. I think on this one I will have to pick Billiards as my hobby. I do it the most often and it is something I enjoy doing. It's also something I feel that I am good at. Drawing I hardly do anymore, unless someone wants me to do something for them. I will draw or paint something out of the blue it's something I can appreciate myself.

Song & Art

2011-02-22T15:34:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 24 & 25.

Day 24. A Song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 25. An Art Piece (painting, drawing, sculpture, etc.)

I skipped over another one, that was "A photo that makes you angry or sad" I don't have any of those.

As far as "A Song that makes me cry (or nearly). Would have to be the one I used for my Mother's Day post a few years back. It was a song that I found and my sisters and I agreed to have it played at my mothers funeral visitation services. You can hear the song here, which was part of a flash movie I did as well.

Mother's Day 2006

Now for an Art Piece. I don't have much of my work scanned into my computer. I recently did do a portrait of Bubba. I can't share that one with you, only cause it's not scanned into my PC. Even if I did I couldn't show it, would give away his identity here. I am thinking of redoing it anyway.

So I will show you a drawing I did of Largetony. Then scanned it into PC and did a digital sort of painting with it in Photoshop. (not to bad considering it was done with a mouse and not digital Pen Pad) He has actually posted this on his old blog, so I know it's cool to share it again. :) (clickable for larger view)

Book and Quote

2011-02-20T22:41:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 22 & Day 23 Favorite Book and Favorite Quote.

Had family visiting this weekend so I missed my Saturday posting. So putting it in with today's instead.

I'm not much of the reader. So not sure I have much of a reference to go on as to what favorite book would be. The ones that I have read are few and far between. I have other things that I prefer to do that help me unwind and relax. (Paint or Draw)

I will pick "The Concrete Sky" as my favorite book. I couldn't put it down and it was a fast page flipper.

As for the favorite quote. "To Thine Own Self Be True."

Your Favorite Song

2011-02-18T16:31:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge

Day 21: My Favorite Song.

Gosh, I couldn't just pick one. That is way to hard. I have A LOT of music on my PC that I listen to and I would say ALL of them are my favorite. So I thought I would pick a favorite song from a few genres of music instead.

Pop - Female: "Happiness - Alexis Jordan" - Liking this one cause I started hearing it about the time I met Bubba.

Pop - Male: "I like It - Enrique Iglesis" - Love the beat of this one.

Rock - Female: "Barracuda - Heart"

Rock - Male: "Uprising - Muse"

Country - Female: "Sweet Music Man - Reba McEntire"

Country - Male: "After All This Time - Rodney Crowell" - Great lyrics

I didn't embed the youtube vids directly, but they are linked ;)

9 more days to go and the Challenge has ended!

5 Good things that happened since I started the challenge

2011-02-17T18:06:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge

Day 20: 5 Good things that happened since I started the challenge

Sadly enough I can think of 5 bad things more so than good that has happened since I started this.

Not sure I can come up with 5. So I will just say what things have happened since I started.

1. Received my State tax refund.
2. Received my Federal tax refund.
*these are good, I don't have to spend them on bills*

3. Bubba LOVED his birthday gift.
4. The weather has gotten warmer!
5. I've won the last 3 pool tournaments. (I think it was the last 3, starting to lose count)

Okay so some of those weren't all that exciting. 3 and 4 are the only highlights for me.

3 Wishes

2011-02-16T18:44:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge

Day 19: 3 Wishes.

Wow just 3?!

1. Hope there is funding in March and April to finish my Dental work.
2. That Bubba recovers okay from his surgery from broken leg.
3. I land more stable employment.

Tomorrow is: 5 good things that happened since you started the challenge.

Although I don't think much has happened really since this started. Need to think about that one.

Something That Stresses You Out

2011-02-15T20:54:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 18: Something That Stresses You Out.

I'm actually skipping over 2. They are:

Put your iPod on shuffle, first 10 songs - One I don't have an Ipod. I had an mp3 player that was similar but gave it to my sister. I post enough music here that don't think there is a need to list 10 songs.

Your Dream Wedding - As much as I could answer this, I am not going to. One I don't see it ever happening anyway. I'm not so much about the wedding environment as I am the sentiment and who I will be marrying. That is what is important. I don't care that much about the fluff of it all.

So onto what stresses me out.

Unfinished business stresses me out. Specially when it is something I really want to do or passionate about and I get interrupted and I didn't get to finish it. I think about it all day. I rack my brain about how I am going to go about it next to get it done. Where I left off, how much farther I got to go. I have a hard time sleeping at night when there is unfinished business.

Bubba Tags

2011-02-14T17:14:00.000-05:00

I finally got to see Bubba since he broke his leg. I saw him on Saturday morning for a few hours. Was a GREAT visit. His birthday is actually the 15th and I probably wouldn't be able to see him that day. So Saturday was also my chance to give him his Birthday gift early.

I had been racking my brain for awhile trying to figure out what I would get him. Then it hit me on Wednesday what it was gonna be. I heard him mention probably a month ago that he had always wanted military dog tags. THAT'S IT! That is what I will get. I was off and on the hunt for these tags.

While living in Louisville, I remember going to an Army surplus store and they made dog tags, I actually went there to get an Army cap for Halloween. Which I never did end up wearing.

Anyway, I had to find a local Army Surplus store here, I figured surely they made them as well. Lucky me, there was one not to far from me, probably 3 minutes away.

I knew what I wanted to put on them. Full name, his Nickname "Bubba" and the date of birth. My real concern was getting the birth date right, specially the year. With a bit of research I was able to figure out what I thought was the correct year.

I was so excited about the idea. So I run to get them made, then I get them home and realize I don't have a gift box to put them in. CRAP! However, I came up with something better.

I thought to myself, this chain looks long enough to fit around my waist. Now all dog tags have a pretty standard size chain length. So these weren't extra long or anything. Just turns out I am that small. LOL So I try them on around my waist. AWESOME! They fit and not too tight either. Now I am really excited about the dog tags.

Bubba is going to be really tickled that his dog tags can fit around my waist. He likes how lean and small my waist and torso are to begin with.

On saturday I arrive at his place and eventually I tell him I will go change my clothes and get comfortable. I change into a black wife beater, Camouflage cargo shorts and was wearing a pair of ankle socks. I go back to the bedroom to the edge of the bed and tell him I am wearing his Birthday gift. He's like "Oh really, it actually fits?!" I was like "Yeah" but it's nothing you can see right now. I raise up my shirt and undo my cargo shorts a bit and reveal that I have a set of dog tags for him. He's grinning from ear to ear.

Turns out I did get the year wrong. But he wasn't worried about that. He said he likes that I got the year wrong. Also he said, he knows I put some effort into trying to find out what it was, but my source for doing so threw me off. He said the date mistake makes it more endearing, cause it will be a reminder that I "Tried" to surprise him and considering my source there was no way I was going to get it right. He thought it was sweet.

But, before I gave them to him I wanted to take some pictures with them on. of course in these pictures I am not wearing what I wore for him. The shorts and beater was last minute decision. I couldn't share these until now. I'm so happy he loves them. I'm also so happy I didn't go with my original idea.

Bubba has a broken leg but that didn't stop him from jumping Birdie before our visit was over!! Bubba's still got it!!

He has had them for awhile now though and he LOVES them! and that is an understatement! ;)

Something I've Learned

2011-02-14T16:36:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge

Day 17: Something I've Learned.

Not all birds of a feather flock together.

Favorite Picture of yourself ALL TIME Why?

2011-02-14T00:15:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 16 Favorite Picture of myself of ALL TIME and why?

Not sure I would say this was a picture of my all time. Unfortunately, that is not a picture I have of myself on my PC or access too anymore.

I will say this one because it was happy times. Granted I am rather young here, but memories then are still vivid for me.

Nicknames

2011-02-12T08:12:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge

Day 15: Nicknames

Ive had many nicknames growing up and as an adult. Along with the various pet names I've had.

1. Buckshot - Nickname my grandfather gave me as a kid.

2. Todd the squad - Weird one I know, neighborhood kid who was mentally slow called me that all the time.

3. Slim - Some of the neighborhood guys who were older than me pegged me with that name.

4. Frog - Gosh can't remember his name, but another one I was pegged with growing up.

5. Honeybunch - Pet nickname my first BF gave me.

6. Boo - Actually been called this by a few guys I was intimate with. Mainly my last BF

7. Hipshit - One my mother use to call me when she suspected I was showing off
The "hip" part is part of my last name.

8. Birdie - Bubba has given me this one. Which sometimes comes out Birdie Boo.
(I Like it)

9. Indiana Slim - It has been referenced a few times, mostly cause of the Billiard thing. Kind of the opposite of the pool player "Minnesota Fats"

Of course there was always the bullying names I've been called, Bean pole and Sideways being a few of them.

Something You Miss

2011-02-11T17:27:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 14: Something You Miss.

Oh this is easy considering what is going on lately with Bubba.

I miss my MUSCLE MONSTER!! RAWR!!!

2 Weeks roughly, I'm about to explode.

Favorite Place To Eat

2011-02-10T19:19:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge

Day 13: Favorite Place To Eat.

This is a bit of a hard one. I don't go out much to eat these days.

I can say that PF Chang's is my least favorite. lol

I am gonna have to go with Logan's Roadhouse on this one. I have been there the most and always seems to be the place I keep going back to.

I like breakfast food the most though. I don't think they serve breakfast there. :(

Tomorrow will be "Something I Miss". Saturday should be fun..That will be "Nicknames"

Rolling In The Deep

2011-02-09T12:07:00.001-05:00

From "Adele - 21" Album. Which is a great album. Of course after listening to it you might want to slit your wrist. lol That doesn't make it bad, it's just a slow sad love song kinda album.

Rolling in the Deep is track 1. Great song.
Track 2 is Rumour Has It. Which is another great catchy song.
as far as the others. I like strong vocals, so I am prone to pick the more powerful tracks. My picks are.

Track 7 Take It All
Track 9 One and Only (has a Janis Joplin feel to it)
Track 13 Hiding My Heart

Dream House & Something I am Looking Forward to

2011-02-09T05:47:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 11 & 12.

Dream House and Something I am Looking Forward To

I missed posting my day 11 post. I usually try to do a post in the evening, but I ended up falling asleep. So this is going to be a double post.

As for dream house, I really haven't given much thought to it really. Not sure that I have one. Always thought if I was able to come into that kinda money I would just go with something practical and simple. As long as it has a pool, hot tub and a Billiard table I am good.

Something I am looking forward to would be 2 things actually. One would be around March and April I am hoping to have some dental work done that I have been waiting to have done for a couple years now. Another would be the 6 weeks of recovery that Bubba has to go through. I haven't seen him since he broke his leg and it's really just bringing me down. Turns out he needs surgery to fix his leg and doesn't have surgery until the 18th. It's all a bit complicated as to why I haven't seen him.

Seeing him is not about sex or being intimate with him at this point. It's more about being there for him during all of this. I miss him :(

Bible Verse

2011-02-07T20:20:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge

Day 10: Bible Verse.

I'm actually not the church going type. Years ago as a teenager I did attend youth group meetings and activities at the local community church.

I actually couldn't even begin to tell you what my religious upbringing was. I think it was either one of these three: Methodist, Presbyterian or Catholic. Frankly, I don't even know the difference in those three either. I guess that is bad of me. I have never been one to follow religion or politics. I certainly don't bring them up in social settings. They are 2 of the biggest conversation faux pas in my opinion. I can tell you the stereotypes of most of them though.

I always felt that I didn't need to go to church to be a good person. After all the Bible is a reference right? A guideline. I feel that I am a good person. I believe the intent of man is good.

I am nice to all who are nice to me in return. So I guess my bible verse would be:

Luke 6:31
Do to others as you would have them do to you.

I really don't judge anyone on their religious beliefs. In fact, I don't even base who I have as friends or who I am in a relationship with on what religion they are. As long as they don't force it upon me. We are entitled to our opinions and practices. You respect mine and I will respect yours.

Broken

2011-02-06T12:34:00.000-05:00

I found out today that Bubba broke his leg from falling on the ice. (DAMN this weather!) He is going to be out of commission for 4-6 weeks in a cast. (I'm so sad)

However, I can still see him, just no bedroom antics for awhile.

Also on this note, I saw the movie "Burlesque" on DVD the other day, it is still fresh in my mind. Thought that Cher's new song "Haven't Seen the Last of Me" was fitting. By the way, it was a nice little movie.

Something I Don't Leave The House Without

2011-02-06T07:50:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 9: Something I Don't Leave The House Without.

CHAPSTICK! At least I try not to leave the house without it. If I do it utterly drives me crazy. Of course I wouldn't leave the house without my wallet either.

Favorite TV Shows

2011-02-05T13:38:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 8: Favorite TV Shows.

1. The Mentalist - I've always had a thing for psychology. I'm the people watcher. I like to watch how people interact with each other. Their body language and all that stuff. Some people just don't pick up on things like that. Specially when I am out at the bar, so interesting how you can tell someone is not into the other person they are talking to just by watching and not even able to listen in. Among other things that you can pick up on. So Love watching this show. It's addictive. It's my top pick of must see. CBS - Thursdays - 10pm/9c

2. Castle - This is almost on the lines of The Mentalist, but it's a writer that is more the consultant on the side this time. ABC - Mondays - 10pm/9c

3. Two & Half Men - Just funny with a bit of inappropriate innuendo adult humor. CBS - Mondays - 9pm/8c

4. The Big Bang Theory - What can I say I am a big computer/techy nerd. Of course this is on my list. CBS - Thursdays - 8pm/7c

5. Shit My Dad Says - This is beginning to grow on me. It is funny. I got hooked cause I liked looking at the cute son. LOL I still don't know why they came up with a title of a show they have to sensor "$#*! My Dad Says". CBS - Thursdays -830pm/730c

There is more, but I am stopping at 5 ;)

Oh Im a big fan of "The New Adventures of Old Christine" too.

Something You're Afraid Of

2011-02-05T01:47:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Oops I didn't get my 7th day posted in time :)

Day 7: Something you’re afraid of.

This is fairly easy one to answer.

I'm afraid of being in a car accident. I don't want to see death coming. Another thing I would be afraid of, dying alone.

Favorite Movies

2011-02-03T19:36:00.000-05:00

30+ day Challenge.

Day 6. Favorite Movies.

Gosh there are so many movies out there these days, hard to even make a choice.

I don't think I am actually going to give titles here, just what kind of movies I like.

I like 2 kinds of movies. One being the happy go lucky romantic comedies where the guy gets the girl in the end. The other horror/suspense movies where people are getting slaughtered or haunted. Okay that last one seems a bit harsh sounding. LOL

I'm a hopeless romantic so any movie where the unlikely person gets to be happy in the end.

See I also like to be scared or the rush of things, that's why the horror/suspense.

Okay maybe I will give a few titles.

The Sweetest Thing ( "You're too big to fit in here, to big to fit in here".. LMAO)
10 Things I Hate About You
Pretty Woman
Eat. Love. Pray. (most didn't like this movie-- I don't care, I really enjoyed it.)
All the "Saw" movies
The Haunting in Connecticut

so there we go to name a few...i think you might get the picture now. :)

A Picture Of Something That Makes Me Happy

2011-02-01T21:30:00.000-05:00

30+ Day Challenge.

Day 5: A picture of something that makes you happy

I have several pictures actually that make me happy when I look at them. Of course that is not very many. Currently there is one that I have in mind but I can't post it here or I won't rather. I'd be exposing someone doing that. Looking at it makes me happy, because they make me happy.

The picture from the the "Parents" post is the only other one that I would have on my PC right now that makes me happy. Not even sure that picture of me and my mother together makes me happy though.

But hey! we all get a happy face when we see babies right. Here's me as a baby. Looks like I am being held at gun point or somethng. LOL Still wondering what happened to my blonde hair.

A Song To Match Your Mood

2011-01-31T20:36:00.002-05:00

Day 4 of 30+ Blog Challenge.

A song to match my mood. Actually I am feeling quite bored, but really kinda just relaxed and quiet this evening.

I saw Bubba last night and he asked me what I would like to listen to in the bedroom. Did I want to change to some Michael Buble or stay with the current Liquid Mind music we usually listen to while intimate. Then he quickly blurted out, maybe some Sade. He chuckled a bit, think he might have been being silly.

Started out to Michael Buble but eventually switched over to Liquid Mind before the evening was over with.

However with that being on my mind, the song to fit my mood currently is Sade. Slow, mellow and even though it wasn't played last night, it reminds me of our evening anyway. Our evening was more fast-paced than Sade. After about 2 weeks apart. Last night was INTENSE.... (Bubba-tastic!)

I picked my favorite..here's the jump.

Your Parents

2011-01-30T18:54:00.003-05:00

Day 3 of the 30+ Blog Challenge.

Day 3 was suppose to be First Love but I am skipping that one and bringing the next one up in it's place.

The person that one might think would be or should be my first love doesn't read my blog, I don't think anyway.
However, the person that I classify as my first love does. I am not about to drudge up that story again. You can read it if you like with the link.

(I want to say sorry for punctuation on this one, it's gonna suck. LOL)

In the first day of interesting facts I told you that I was my father's only son. My parents divorced when I was at very young age, so I don't remember them being together to much. I remember the bad times more than the good. I remember all the yelling the screaming, the fighting, the hitting and the crying. So there is no mystery that my Father was abusive to my Mother. That is also why on day 1 of interesting facts I listed that I don't deal with confrontation hearing it or being apart of it. Makes me very very uneasy. The last apartment that I moved from we had a neighbor woman that screamed at the top of her lungs at her child, mean hateful things. I hated it! I couldn't stand to hear it.

My father has a brother, my dad being the oldest. My uncle, well that is a whole blog post in itself. We'll just say he is part of the "family" other than just blood.

Back in the day my father use to ride horses and do rodeo. That was before my mother. When they met, to the best of my memory, my father was a cop for the local surrounding town.

They didn't meet on very good circumstances, from what my mother told me years ago, he picked her up one night when she ran off from her last husband. Which is actually my Sisters father. He was also abusive to my Mother. Long story short My Father and Mother became close. My Father had confrontation with my sisters dad. There was a fight, my dad lost his front teeth. They got married and eventually had me. Okay so there was some missing stuff there. LOL

My father is currently paraplegic and has been for years. It happened probably now a good 26 years or so ago. I was young and to this day I can't remember what my father looks like standing up. He fell asleep behind the wheel of his car on Mothers day. He owns his own business doing lawn mower and small engine repair. We still get along, I don't see him as much, we barely have anything in common. Considering I lived with my mother after the divorce I was closer with my mother than my father.

My mother was the second youngest of gosh....11 or 12 brothers and sisters? She was from a big family I know that.

My mother was a drinker and could be a bit rowdy and had the mouth of a trucker. Looking back now as an adult, she was probably a lot of fun. Mind you I did have my moments where I didn't like all the drinking. It could be a little much sometimes. I was going to bars and drinking with my mother when I was 15 probably younger. I know, sounds awful, but really it wasn't. Playing quarters with my mother was a blast. My mother was always like, if you are going to do it I'd rather you do it in front of me then off someplace else. In spite of my upbringing I think I turned out okay. I'm not a drug addict, I've never had a run in with the law and I am not a big drinker. I almost don't drink at all actually.

My mother passed away in 2002 from cancer. Granted I really didn't do her justice in this post, cause I have covered all this before in my blog. I do miss her a lot. She was my best friend, I told her everything. I miss her laugh and the smell of her perfume. So much now of my life that I wish she would have known about. Things that have happened that I wish she was around for to tell her. All the happy moments and the bad moments. When I lost my mother I think the biggest thing that got to me was, there wasn't going to be anyone around anymore to be proud of me and that unconditional love.

When my mother passed away my father told me, "I'm still here". Although I love my father very much and I am glad he is still around. You have to admit mother and father is just not quite the same.

Meaning Behind Your Blog Name

2011-01-29T03:05:00.001-05:00

30+ Day Challlenge

Day 2: Meaning behind your blog name

IMNOT2BZY if pretty self-explanatory. I used this name for my blog because that is what all my screen names have been in the past. Of course not all my screen names across the net are "Imnot2bzy". Years and years ago I started out as RU2BZ2PLA, then it just kind of evolved into IMNOT2BZY. That was back in the AOL years. Do people still use that god forsaken piece of crap? I know every once in awhile I will have someone message me with ASL? (Age, Stats & Location) Uh! I'm sorry but AOL is over. Anywho!

My blog did also start out having a subtitle, which was "Taste Like Yesterday's News." That subtitle is now gone, but in some instances across the net you can still see it in reference to my blog. Taste Like Yesterday's News came about from a song that I liked. Cause by the time I got around to posting something it was already yesterday's news. Once again, it is pretty self-explanatory. I started this blog back during a bad period of my life. I was so depressed and needed something to express feelings and vent. Wake older and try to move on. ;)

So roughly, if I am posting anything, I'm not to busy basically.

As for the song. Here it is.

Introduce Yourself

2011-01-28T00:40:00.003-05:00

I am beginning this 30 day challenge. I haven't been posting as much as I use to, you know back when this whole blog began. So with this, it will at least get more post out of me.

Day 1: Introduce yourself with a recent picture and 15 interesting facts

Hey everybody my name is Todd. Of course some of you already know that or at least figured it out. Of course I am better known across the net as Imnot2bzy. Googling it will yield a large result. You’ll probably even come across things you can’t exactly see here. Eeks!

These are as recent as it gets. First pic. I will say, uh I have recently retired as Tunnel Inspector. (Inspired by Bubba)

This picture was taken at 501 Eagle. I am not a fan of being photographed by a cellphone. They usually look HORRIBLE!

Once again, this was at 501 Eagle. My friends are always trying to get me in this thing. To the point of picking me up and trying to carry me and put me in it. Crowd was low, I said OKAY I will sit in the sling but you better hurry cause I am not sitting in it for long. I think it's safe to say they will now stop attempting to get me into this thing. Not that I am a prude, I just don't like drawing attention to myself.

I will admit this 30+ challenge is going to be hard for me to keep up with. I’m sure I am going to slack a bit.

So 15 interesting facts about me, I don’t know if they all are interesting or not, but okay!

1.    I am a small town Midwest boy, originally from Kingman, IN (600 pop.)

2.    I am my fathers only son

3.    I have been playing pool/billiards since I was 14.

4.    One might say I have a bad habit of giving money to
         people/beggers on the street

5.    I have become aware that when I like a guy I buy him underwear.

6.    I love to sleep!

7.    I have a rather high pitch laugh that most haven’t heard
         because I suppress it. (Unless I am comfortable with you.)

8.    I have a taste for salty, sour and/or spicy things as oppose to sweet

9.    I like to cook for a guy who has a big appetite and enjoys eating.

10.    I wear a size 7.5 shoe

11.    I’d rather eat raw veggies or fruits as a snack than junk snacks.

12.    I’m not comfortable with confrontation in any form
         hearing it or being a part of it.

13.    My ears/sense of hearing is really sensitive.

14.    I prefer to brush my teeth in the shower

15.    I’m addicted to chapstick

Not Joking

2011-01-25T19:33:00.001-05:00

Every now and then I would get emails/messages from people that would have the letter "J" at the end of their sentences.

Like for example in this sentence from an email I got from Bubba.

Love the pic…so sexy…looks like me and you J

Now at first I thought it meant they were "joking" or something like that. I eventually just got to the point to ignore it. I would also get emails from my sister with these letter "J's". Of course with Bubba's sentence I really didn't think he would be joking.

I did some research to see if anyone else had figured this mess out. Turns out that "J" is a smiley face in Outlook email client. Actually it enters it as a wingding and when you get it it's not only in a different font but it's also capital letter. So there you have it. Any time you see that funky letter J at the end of a sentence or what not someone responded via MS Outlook mail client. Which now makes sense cause I know Bubba does use Outlook to read his mail and so does my sister from her job.

As for the picture!?

Here it is...Bubba has been under the weather and not feeling well. I haven't seen him in awhile because of that. I was surfing around and came across this picture that reminded me of he and I. I sent it and told him I missed Bubba.

Bit of a break

2011-01-13T16:18:00.000-05:00

In the process of moving- again! ugh. This was a bit unexpected but needed to happen.

Will be back to posting more frequently after settled in to the new place and my main PC is backup and Internet service has been transfered.

I'm planning to do the the 30+ day challenge to get the flow moving again. Idea came via "West of Mayberry". Granted Tony is not the originator, but I do read his blog regularly. Found it to be interesting, so going to give it a whirl.

Christmas Juggling

2010-12-27T16:34:00.000-05:00

I didn’t go home for Christmas this year. I pretty much stayed home and did nothing during the day. That still doesn’t mean I didn’t have a good day.

Christmas Eve I went to some friend’s house for gifts and pizza. Then after that I went out to 501 with pool with Brian and David. Christmas Eve was Friday and that was our regular night for pool. I basically had to juggle doing 2 things for the whole holiday weekend.

It seemed like I hadn’t heard from Bubba in forever. (actually it had only been 4 days.hehe) I knew that he was going out of town to visit his family. I made sure I texted him and wished him Merry Christmas and a safe trip. I did that on the 23^rd. I knew that he would be busy with family and didn’t want to bother him on Christmas day.

On Christmas day I received a text from him wishing me Merry Christmas. Told him that I missed him, he returned and said he missed me as well. We had a rather lengthy conversation via text as usual. At one point he was being funny. We were talking about cornish hen being tasty. LOL

Me: You make me Laugh ;) It makes my day.

Bubba: Awwww....my heart is beating a little faster now ;)

I told him that when he gets back he may not make to the bedroom before I have him naked! It’s going to be savage! He responded with:

Bubba: Give u the Big Beef and Belly throw down ;)

Bubba: I'll just have to wrap my meat hooks around ya and move u to the bedroom ;)

Bubba: I am still playing back the vision of last time u were over and u came back from bathroom and the sun was just coming up and your thin bod was so cute...it aroused the “beast” in me ;)

He’s so sweet sometimes. So my Christmas day was nice. I wasn’t expecting him to message me. Thanks for the Christmas Boner ;)

Then Christmas night I was invited to a house party for those to come after they had done the family thing. I did that up until 10:30pm, and then I had another scheduled date at 11pm for an online chat. I chatted with a long standing sexy friend for 4 hours. That is always a treat. He is out of state, we schedule chat times to catch up with each other. Thanks T for the Christmas night tuck-in.

Sunday I just roughly did squat all day! I did my usual evening Pool tournament though. That puts an end to my holiday weekend.

Let Me Redirect You

2010-12-04T02:24:00.000-05:00

Okay you Valhummer whores!

The last link I had for the Valhummer blog is not currently working anymore. Last time I did some research on my own to find him. Although he found me and posted his new link in a comment. I removed the non-working link. (again)

I get more traffic looking for Valhummers than almost anything else. Sure I will continue getting traffic looking for this notorious Valhummer.

Today however I am going to redirect you to some places that could potentially be better options. Plus, they are consistent and they probably aren't going anywhere anytime soon. So here is my list. A list you won't find posted on my blogroll but from my own personal bookmarks.

WARNING these are NSFW links

Hugedudes.net
(video clips)

Mature & Bear Men Hideaway
(Pictures -Updated almost daily)

Real Mature Men Hideaway
(Pictures -Updated almost daily)

Muscle Man Hideaway
(Pictures -Updated almost daily)

A Little Gritty
(Pictures - amateur)

A Brawny Stud
(Pictures -Updated almost daily)

Woof!Blog
(Pictures & Video Clips -Updated regularly)

Not Only Bear
(Pictures & Video Clips -Updated regularly)

Straight Loads
(Pictures -Updated Semi-regularly)

Total Cock Worship
(Pictures -Updated Semi-regularly)

Gods Amongst Men
(Pictures & Occasional Video Clips)

Matt XXX
(Video Clips & Pictures - Most being TIM *Treasure Island Media*)

If you are really serious about your porn, then educate yourself about Bittorrent and visit
Gay-Torrents
and kiss those blogs & :15 sec clips from xtube and xvideos goodbye!

Worked Out by Bubba

2010-12-02T05:06:00.001-05:00

I’ve been noticing the days afterward of meeting and wrestling around with Bubba, of course I wouldn’t exactly call it wrestling. (Sexual Rough Housing?) My body is so sore, my abs hurt, my legs and thighs are sore. Okay so I haven’t exactly been working out lately to be use to this sort of thing. However, we are talking about 230lbs of beef rolling me around on the bed and laying on top of me. I have to flex and tighten up my abs when lying on my belly as he is on top of me, just so I can breathe and keep him from crushing me.

Okay that sounds bad I know. His intention is not to hurt me. Some of us might enjoy the weight of someone lying on top of us. I can handle it. Of course there is the occasional playful resistance I give in return with trying to muscle him off of me. Or when I am sitting across his torso trying to pin his arms down and I am unsuccessfully but playfully trying to restrain him. I am never successful in that regard. (Not that I want to be)

I’m no stranger to being with a bodybuilder; experienced a guy like that years ago (2004 or around that time). Nice guy, think I even blogged about him, name was John. He was from California, sent me flowers, we spent 3 days at a local bed & breakfast when he came to visit me. Turned out he wasn’t prepared for the long distance relationship he said. My only hang up with the bodybuilder, was the shaved body hair. Granted, smooth can be nice, but after 2 days it was like rubbing against a brillo-pad. Bits and pieces of my body and face were so chaffed the 3rd day when he left. Bubba does not shave his body. (YAY!!) – I love a hairy or fuzzy belly. His belly is the only hairy part of his torso. His chest is smooth. He has hair on his arms, his legs and he actually has bush above his cock! (YAY!! again)

So meetings with Bubba are pretty interesting. He makes such the effort I tell you! When I arrive there is like candles everywhere that he has lit, from the kitchen, living room, all the way to the bedroom. Clothes wise, he has done his research and knows what I find to be sexy and a turn on so he is always making sure to wear the right apparel that I like. (Not that he has too) I find it sexy not only what he has managed to wear, but he had taken the initiative to find this stuff out and remember. (*edit - oops, I told him what I liked awhile back before we met - He remembered though)

I come in the door; he always takes my coat and hangs it up as I am taking off my shoes. He is usually back waiting on me to finish with my shoes and eagerly waiting for me to put them aside so he can lean down wrap his arm around my waist and hoist me up over his shoulder and carry me off to the bedroom. Then he flips me down on the bed and stands and strips off his clothes, which he is usually naked before I am, so then he is helping me off with my pants and what ever else needs pulling off. Basically, then he pounces on me – okay not exactly pounce. More or less like this massive mound of flesh & muscle crawling up across the bed like I’m prey and he is going to eat me. He’s definitely the beast in bed. But also gentle as well, when he nuzzles in my neck and is sweet to me. He also loves for me to rub his belly. (Did I mention I love a fuzzy belly =P )

Before I get any further off track and reveal WAY too much. (I was getting a bit excited there.) I’m not sharing all the intimate and juicy details. The point of this post was that with me being with a guy this size, it is definitely the workout. Oh so worth it though. I will eventually get use to it I’m sure. However, he is still getting bigger.

It’s been a good sore – Feel the burn!!

M.U.B

2010-12-01T15:25:00.000-05:00

Men's Underwear Blog has posted my winning entry from the underwear contest today. I wonder if they did it today cause I won the Wednesday pair of Aussiebum. lol

Here's the jump.
M.U.B - Men's Underwear Blog - Another Winning Entry

World AIDS Day 2010

2010-12-01T01:07:00.002-05:00

http://www.worldaidsday.org

Muscle Monster. RAWR!!

2010-11-27T20:53:00.002-05:00

Okay so I have a new guy I am seeing on a semi regular basis. Let’s see where to start in describing him. HUGE – would be a good start. He’s built like a brick shithouse would be another way. He is 5’9 and 230lbs of Beef, as he would put it. Salt and pepper hair and the brightest green eyes I’ve ever seen. He’s just down right fuckin’ adorable and playful. He likes the fact that he is SO much bigger than me, that turns him on. He is twice my size basically. His biceps are as big as my thigh. (He measured them. LOL) We met off of Bigmuscle.com

He does have a boyfriend. They live apart and apparently they see each other on the occasional weekday and weekends and I see him during the week when he is free. Now typically I am not one to get mixed up in other people’s open relationship. Hard enough to find my own, let alone share someone else’s. He is such a nice guy and apparently his boyfriend encouraged him to join Bigmuscle website and find buddies. So I am going against my rule of messing with a taken guy. But, it is what it is; it’s purely physical at this point. I find him to be very intoxicating to be around, I can’t get enough sometimes. I told him I’m getting addicted to Bubba. (He laughed)

Underwear Contest

2010-11-21T16:06:00.000-05:00

So a few weeks ago I entered the "My Favorite Day" underwear contest at "Men's Underwear Blog"

Sometime after Halloween I got word that I was one of the winning entries.

I had only submitted once. However I did send in more than one photo. I couldn't choose which photo I liked best, so I sent a series of photos in my Baskit underwear and let them decide.

The prize was a pair of AussieBum MyDay Limited Run underwear. I was to select size,then they would send me which pair came available. Couple days ago I received my new undies. They sent me Wednesday Hip Trunk in Red. Which is cool, gives me something special to wear on free pool Wednesday nights.

Below is a series of photos I took of the new underwear. In this series I think the bottom one is my favorite.

Make it Happen

2010-11-03T05:18:00.000-04:00

So a lot has happened since my last post. I can safely say that there hasn’t been anyone else wanting to go with the flow. There has been a short blond cutie that has latched on to me like a lost puppy at 501. Wow, that is a doozy of a post on its own. I’m torn over what to do with that, still on going situation. (More next time on that)

However, I have been feeling philosophical lately and thinking about bucket lists. I don’t know why, perhaps it is age. Perhaps it is my life really hasn’t gone anywhere since 2002. After that I was trying to pick up the pieces and figure out who I really was finally on my own without any influences. Wasn’t until I was 30 that I was comfortable in my own skin and knew who I was again.

First off I would like to point out someone that I know and admire. Granted I am just a person looking from the outside in. But, Matt aka (The Net Monkey) has got his shit together.

I follow him on a regular basis and I tell you I am just in awe sometimes of this guy.

Granted life throws everyone a hurdle here and there. He is smart, funny, worldly, well read, established and an inspiration. Plus has one hella-cute boyfriend. He has worked hard for all he has got and he deserves every bit of happiness in return. I don’t know where he finds the energy for most of it. My hat is off ;)

A thing that constantly haunts me is? I am a 36 year old guy who has never been on a plane. I am a 36 year old guy who has never seen the ocean. Yeah, yeah, I hear you gasping. I’ve lost count of how many people have said, “Are you serious?” Yes I am totally serious here. The honesty behind that is, I have never been financially able to travel. Countless guys across states and oceans have invited me to visit. Gosh when I think of all the missed opportunities and places I could have seen. The missed experiences and friendships, is just saddening.

Somewhere between being 20 year old gay male hell bent on love that brought him to the big city to now, beyond 30 years old and a kicked depression I have lost it. I have lost that ambition. That - let’s do it now and think about consequences later, ambition.

I over think things now, there isn’t a night that goes by that I don’t lie there in bed and think about my entire day. What it was I did. How I did it. How I could have done it better. What I said, what I shouldn’t have and what I should have said. Shoulda, coulda, woulda? An hour and half and 2 pisses later I am able to fall asleep.

Granted, thinking ahead and weighing the pros and cons are good in certain situations but in most cases it has held me back. That nagging what-if!

I have been hesitant about doing and experiencing some of the things I have not done because I wanted to share them with someone when I did them. You know what, what if that someone was the one that was waiting for me on the other side of what it was I was to experience. Then they would be the one to go the rest of the way with me. I thought I found that someone once. Turned out that wasn’t the time. What if it wasn’t even the right person anyway?

I know how it works and I know I am the only one that can change it and make it happen.

Can I change, yes I can. Will I change; yes I am sure I will. We will no longer be who we were and still not yet be what we will become.

Risk we must right? A man that doesn’t risk has forfeited freedom; he is a slave, chained to old habits and emotions. A man that does not risk, does not grow, change or feel. Only the man that risk can be a free man.

I so need to start making things happen.

No Flow

2010-10-18T00:29:00.001-04:00

So the guy I was "going with the flow" with has come to an end. Not really sure it was flowing to begin with. It was more like a trickle. I messaged him and said, "guess things have just kind of fizzled out haven't they". He said, he got so busy with school and usually around this time of year he gets depressed so things for him just kinda wasn't happening. He stated he guessed that he wasn't ready. I kind of figured he wasn't. Of course I never did ask how long ago it had been that he and his last boyfriend broke up.

I still have twenty year old guys coming out of my ears, so who is to say what will be next. My weekend was pretty much boring to say the least. Sunday's are always fun though, I enjoy my pool tournament nights.

Btw...where are the 30 and up guys!? Thinking I need someone in my own age bracket here. LOL

Summer Shorts

2010-10-13T09:33:00.001-04:00

Summer is over with =(

Although still a few days left of some decently warm weather. Which is good, cause I can still see a few guys running around in shorts and sneakers.

Yep, that be my summer fetish. Love guys in shorts and running shoes. Preferably, with no socks or at least no shows. Also like a guy with nice hairy legs and meaty calves. Grrr!! **update** I found examples!!! YAY --> clicky!

Sunday night I was in shorts and sneakers overload, I was surrounded by them. I almost couldn't concentrate on my pool game.

I was trying to hunt down a picture to go along with this post. Unfortunately, I couldn't find any good ones. Google offered me no help in that area.

I have no fall or winter attire attractions. None that I know of anyway. Unless a new one evolves.

Weekend Odds and Ends #4

2010-10-04T23:47:00.001-04:00

Okay so these post aren't working out like I had planned. I can't seem to post more during the week to separate them.

I had a shitty weekend anyway. Only thing good that came of it was spending some of early Saturday night with friend Brian at 501 playing pool.

I haven't seen hide nor hair of the guy I am "going with the flow" with since our crappy night last Wednesday.

Late Saturday night I was going to go play cards with my ex and his friends, but needed to reserve my gas. That same night I sent an email to him that I really didn't need to send. I think it said something on the lines of, "My apologies for being a lousy boyfriend and partner". Of course that part of my life was 8 years ago or more. It was a message that was long over due though.

Mostly spent my Saturday night playing Lord of the Rings Online. Then Sunday I slept all day or at least laid in bed. I didn't even go to my regular pool tournament. Of course I ended up being awake 3-4am Monday morning. I just wanted my weekend over with.

I got confirmation from my guy that he honestly does like me and likes being with me, but he is not sure where it is going right now but he does want to go slow and doesn't want to get into anything without being sure. I'm not sure where it is going either, feels like someone is dangling a carrot on a line in front of me. I smell it and every once in awhile I get a lick of it but keep stumbling when it gets yanked away from me again.

Free Pool Wednesday

2010-09-30T02:04:00.000-04:00

So Monday night was nice as usual. My last post I spoke about the guy I am (whatever) Okay damn it, I need titles!!! The guy I am going with the flow with?? Ugh.

Anyway, he stayed the night again. I have to say I always like the morning after better. There is nothing like morning wood to get the affection going again. I’ve noticed that he is more affectionate in the morning, touching, rubbing and body grinding. I’m thinking that’s why I enjoy the morning after. Of course there is always the avoidance of kissing due to morning breathe. Hell at this point I don’t even care! After waking up with each other on 2 other occasions, I’m over the squeamish morning kiss.

We did manage to go for free pool at Greg’s tonight. After all is said and done. I have to say that it was a bit to early for us to be going to the bar together. True, the bar was dead, but it was just uncomfortable. I had also counted on that my friends would be out with us. It turned out they weren’t able to make it, which is fine. So it just ended up being just the two of us.

I know we did establish that we weren’t putting a title on things and we are just going with the flow for now. I wasn’t quite aware of what my boundaries were when we were out though. I wasn’t sure whether it was alright to be affectionate with each other or not. The story behind going with the flow, was that him and his last boyfriend went to fast he felt and he wanted to go slow this time. I can definitely understand that part. I didn’t want to go in for a kiss at the bar and get a bad response.

This all requires more communication now between us both at this point. We parted ways early tonight and wasn’t able to talk about the whole experience. While we were out my sister called me twice. The first time I didn’t answer it because I was out on a date. I had a feeling she was calling with some computer issues anyway, which she was. After the second time, I told him she isn’t giving up. I told him I didn’t want to return her call because I was busy. He said it was alright. So I went outside and returned her call and she was having email issues and freaking out. I was on the phone for a good 5 minutes or more while he played pool by himself. I felt AWFUL!

We finished our pool after my phone call and we were about to leave and he ran into a friend that had rode his bike to the bar. However, the bar wasn’t going to let him put his bike inside because he had forgotten his bike lock. So my guy made a call to one of his friends nearby and they offered to come to the bar with their Ford Explorer and he could put his bike in the back of that and they would stay at the bar until he was ready to leave so it would be safe. So with that, my guy felt bad that a friend of his came to the bar just for that to hang out and he didn’t want to leave him at the bar by himself. So he drove me back home and was going to go back to the bar.

Now that I was home I could remote connect to my sister’s computer and help her with email issue. We kissed goodbye and he went back to Greg’s to keep his friend company.

I texted him that I felt bad about the phone call, he said it was alright. He said he felt bad that he had to go back to the bar to keep his friend company, since he called him to help another friend and he had to be there until the guy with the bike was done.

I eventually told him I was going to bed because I didn’t want him to seem rude to his friend to have to keep texting me back and forth on his phone. So I let him be for the rest of the evening.

I wasn’t uncomfortable or displeased with having my phone call from my sister and I wasn’t displeased with him having to go back to the bar cause of that whole issue. I was uncomfortable and displeased cause the boundaries were clouded while we were out. After having 3 nights of staying the night together under my belt…and being out and having the urge to be affectionate with him…I think I am beyond going with the flow…. LOL

Weekend Odds and Ends #3

2010-09-27T19:28:00.001-04:00

I didn’t manage to post anything last week. Oops! It went pretty fast I guess.

Friday night I had a meeting with a guy. (I’m withholding names) It went pretty good. Better than expected I guess you could say. We had already established during the week of back and forth messaging online and texting that we liked each other personality wise, as much as one can get from without actually meeting. He was out of town and was due back in Indy on Friday night. Even though he was flying back in that night from Texas he said he was still fine with meeting the same night. I wasn’t holding him to it though, because I knew that he might end up being too tired. After flight delays he did make it into town. Instead of our regular scheduled time of ten thirty, we ended up meeting around midnight or after.

Our meeting went great. We established that we clicked in person as well. The clicking went so well, that he stayed the night.

Saturday night we made plans to watch a movie and cuddle on the sofa then head out to 501 afterward. We ended up watching the movie and cuddling but by the time the movie was over we were not up for going out. I think after that long period of lying on the sofa that we got a little sleepy and lost the motivation to go out to the bar. Once again he stayed the night Saturday night as well.

Sunday being my regular night for pool tournament I went to Greg’s on Sunday. He and I had originally talked that he would come with me to the pool tournament, but he decided he was in a stay in kind of mood that night. So I was cool with him not coming if he didn’t want to. He did ask me though if I wanted him there with me. Told him it was up to him and he didn’t have to if he didn’t want to. Besides he had class the next day. (He's 23 and in College) My pool tournaments sometimes run long so he would have been out late.

This Sunday was the first Sunday I had been back to Greg’s for pool tournaments in about 2 months or so, since I was going to Metro instead. Since their change in rules I won’t be going back to Metro for awhile. I ended up getting 2nd place at Greg’s on Sunday.

So here we are its Monday night and we once again have plans to hangout tonight with each other. We’ve had a little discussion about what it was we were doing. We have decided we are just going with the flow and seeing how things go without titles. (Seeing each other, Dating or whatever.) We both agree on not moving to fast or jumping the gun. Also we are definitely in agreement we are “A one man, man”. I’m not one to juggle all kinds of guys anyway when I really like a guy and enjoy being with that guy. I like to focus on just one person.

We talked about going out for free pool on Wednesday night – that will be our actual first time out and about with each other. Plus giving an opportunity for my friends to meet him as well. Plans could change though, it’s still only Monday. LOL

Weekend Odds and Ends #2

2010-09-21T22:48:00.002-04:00

Shit Motherfucker fuck shit!!

I forgot to post my weekend odds and ends post on Monday.

Okay Friday evening my sister came for a visit. I was told to be standing out on the porch when she called and said she was close. I went to take out the trash and when I came back she was parked out front in a new car. Well, not new but different one than what I was expecting. She got a new pearl white Cadillac Eldorado.

I had been up since 4:30am that morning, so I knew I wasn’t in the mood to be going out that night. I cooked her dinner and then we watched the rest of Season six of Sex and the City. She wanted to finish watching the rest of the season’s before she watched the new movie. We were up until 6am Saturday morning before going to bed and still had 4 episodes left. We woke back up around 11am and finished watching the last 4 then we watched Sex and the City movie. Well Sex and the City 2, she had already seen the first movie. I don’t think part 2 was as good as the first one and I don’t think the movies were as good as the series. She left and went home when the movie was over. I actually went back to bed.

Saturday I didn’t do shit. Actually now that it is Tuesday, Saturday is a blur so I must not have done anything exciting. It was probably laundry that I did. Oh yes, that’s right I went back to bed that night and I slept Saturday away.

Sunday is my normal night or had been my normal night for pool tournaments at Metro Nightclub. I say had been cause I don’t intend to go back for awhile and I will explain that here in a second.

Earlier that day I had seen on facebook a message about that they had made some changes to the pool tournament to make it interesting and fun. I comment that I am curious as to what these changes were. Yes I am back on facebook. In spite of deleting my account the last time and it still managed to piss me off within 30 minutes of creating a new account.

Anyway the pool tournament sign up is at 8pm and the start time is 8:30pm instead of 9:30pm. Which is nice now cause it ran so frickin’ late before. That is the one and only good change they made.

I get there and find out that the new changes are, if you spend $2 or more at the bar you get a point added to your score. You have got to be shitting me!? This is not a change I like at ALL. For starters I don’t drink. Well not expensive drinks. I only buy soda when I am out and usually I just buy one drink and it last me the whole time I am there or sometimes I buy one soda and the rest is free refills.

True, I do go to the pool tournaments for the fun. But I also go for the challenge, skill and sport of it. Plus it’s a nice end to my weekend doing something I enjoy. This change just takes that all away. At this point you don’t have to be a skilled player, you can spend more than me and win the tournament and can be a suck ass player. So until they change those rules I am going back to my original place of Greg’s for their pool tournaments. I did get wind that the changes were only in testing phase and they could change. I understand that they do benefit the bar, but I don’t think it’s a fair change. A few other people agree with me. It will be nice to see my other regular pool buddies from Greg’s again though.

So that is the extent of my weekend. The tournament sucked, okay I did win 2nd or 3rd place, I don’t know which cause the pay out was the same for each. The nice part was I did get to hang out with my friends and have a good time.

(opening statement is from Sex and the City Season 6) My favorite line that season.

Weekends

2010-09-19T13:16:00.000-04:00

Was wondering whether or not I should make Weekend Odds and Ends a regular posting or not. Because there are some weekends I don't do anything all that exciting worth posting about.

A certain Blondish guy has removed a profile of his from the net making it now harder to communicate with him. I didn't manage to get an email or a phone number :( I'm rationalizing all kinds of reasons that might have made him do so. Did he gain a boyfriend, did he get totally pissed off at the guys online (which I can relate too)Is he deciding to create another profile and just hasn't gotten around to it. Has he just taken a break for awhile and if so how long.

Perhaps now all I can do is just wait to see if he resurfaces. Heck for all I know he may not even want to talk to me anymore.

So far this weekend hasn't been that eventful. Will explain more in detail on Monday for weekend odds and ends post.

Got Chest!?

2010-09-17T07:48:00.000-04:00

I need a chest like this. No - seriously I need a chest like this, anyone have one!? LOL

The best part of this for me is at 3:04 when he raises his arms and shows his armpits!! =P

Music sucks! But this at least gives you something to look at for the weekend.

Sorta Kinda Date

2010-09-07T01:38:00.002-04:00

So as of lately I have been in a funk and down in the dumps over a guy I met recently. I didn’t think that I wanted to post anything about it. Especially when you have potential guys you would like to date reading your blog.

This just has been weighing on me so much lately. Quite honestly I don’t know why I have let it bother me so much, maybe it’s because it is something I haven’t experienced before and I am new at how to handle the situation.

I’m the kind of guy that doesn’t like the idea of someone being upset with me or not liking me. Now when I say not liking me I mean even on a friend basis too. Not liking me because you don’t find me attractive is different. That is something I can deal with and understand. I have people I have met as well that I didn’t click with physically or sexually. I get that and understand that.   I don’t like having enemies I don’t like people thinking bad of me. So in a nut shell you could say I have issues with about what others think of me; on a certain level that is.

I am also a person that has a tiny bit of belief in fate. I always believe something happens for a reason or someone was put in your life for a reason or purpose. At this point I am swinging towards this guy was put in front of me to handle this new situation or experience. Of course that is not what I thought at first. At first I thought, okay all the signs are here this is the one I am supposed to meet. Small things like: The instant attraction when first seeing them, you are like – wow this is the guy for me. Next being you seen them out and about, constantly running into each other making eye contact. Either you shop in the same place or even realize you go to the same doctor. It is like okay, here it is constantly being presented to me and it is up to me to do something about it. Either you take the jump at your chance or it passes you by.

I wasn’t even sure this guy was even attracted to me. I stumble upon him online, yes online. We exchange a few messages, I find out that yes there is mutual interest and attraction. YAY! I’m tickled and delighted. My first mistake that I realize I let my long years of being single and love sick get in the way. I have a tendency to swoon too much; if you catch my drift.   Being a hopeless romantic doesn’t help much either in certain situations.

Ever have moments where you get so excited about something and it goes bad? Something so good is going your way that you rush out and tell everyone before you even know the outcome and it goes sour. Doesn’t it seem like it always works that way? It stinks sometimes. So I always try to make a point not to get excited too much because I think it will ruin it.

So we arrange to meet. No not for dinner. No not for a drink. We are both night owls and not a hell of a lot you can do at 3am in the morning. After what had transpired, I wish I would have done it differently. We could have gone for a walk on the canal.   No we decide he is going to come to my place.   We both mutually agreed to it. We were both in agreement that this was not going to be a hook-up. I was totally cool with that. I was genuinely interested, that I did want to get to know him without sex involved. When I meet anyone I always hope that it would end up more than sex. I don’t even expect sex when meeting people.   Unless of course it’s stated right up front – okay this is just NSA sex. We’re male, we’re only human I get it, it happens.

He states to me that I will need to give him plenty of time to get ready considering the condition that he was in and asked if that would be alright.   Naturally giving my excitement that I finally get to meet this guy, I would agree to wait however long he needed to get ready.   Of course I needed time myself to get all showered and cleaned up.

After we were finished we were to message and let the other one know. I was finished before him. I wasn’t to clear on what condition he was in exactly that he needed so much time for, but I had my assumptions. The fact that he wanted so much time just told me he was probably just excited about the meeting and wanted to make sure he was really detailed about how he presented himself for the first time. Which is a good sign, not only his interest but he was just as nervous as I was.   Granted I did tend to detail myself. I made sure all things were clipped, trimmed, filed and what not.

An hour and half later he is ready. (You’ll find out what took so long in a minute)

I give him directions; he is familiar with the area and knows exactly where I am located with no trouble.

He said he was so nervous, I told him I was too. But I would try my best not to be so he would be comfortable and at ease when he was here. We agree to watch a movie and hang out.

He arrives; I ask him if he would be more comfortable downstairs or if he would like to go upstairs to my room to watch the movie. Because my roommate would be back home soon. He was cool with upstairs.

We sit on the bed for awhile and talk trying to calm the nerves. We talk about our recent run ins with each other and how I saw him out and about a few times and how I saw him at the Doctor’s office. I looked like crap that day, I went and sat in the corner out of view so he couldn’t see me that day.   Realizing we had the same Doctor in common, gave us enough material to talk about to start and he said he was finally comfortable and not so nervous and was able to sit back on the bed and relax.

I grab a stack of DVD’s from my collection and ask him what kind of movies he likes. We end up liking the same genre of movies. Great!

So joking around I ask him, wow an hour and half to get ready? He said he had to shave his head or buzz it rather. He removed his hat to show me. After that he kept it off.

We decide on a movie, we get comfy on the bed, lying on our stomachs towards the TV with pillows.   I give him the side of the bed closest to the air vent because he said he was hot.

At this point we are pretty comfortable now with each other and he gets close up to me and puts his arm around me and his leg over me.   I look up and over at him and he is grinning and ask me what? I say oh nothing; I just still can’t believe you are finally here. He says, well I am.

During the course of the movie he is pretty into it, getting all jumpy cause it’s a suspense flick. I tell him I should have been the one holding on to him instead of him holding me. I would have preferred it that way, but still wanted him to have the cool air blowing on him.

About mid way through the movie, here is where things begin to get a little off course. I ask him if he would like something to drink, totally forgetting that he had a bottle of Gatorade on the floor he brought with him. Oh that’s right! I said. He did ask me though if I had beer. I told him I didn’t but wish I did though. I said I had some hard stuff though, Gin, JD, Crown Royal and Tequila. I didn’t have anything to mix it with unfortunately. By this time we are down in the kitchen looking in the cabinet and we agree to do a shot of tequila. I didn’t mind, figured that would help take the edge off a bit.

Back lying on the bed again same position, I’m looking at him again and then turn away. So the tequila is kicking in and I had a desire to want to kiss him. I told him I would like to kiss him, he doesn’t say anything just leans in and kisses me. It’s nice! Lean out; lean back in for another kiss. (Granted my pants are on fire at this point) I retain myself, I turn to continue to watch the movie some more, his leg still over me, his arm still around me and we are holding hands.

We did talk during the movie and prior to the movie so I did learn some things about his past and present. We had several things in common. The cuddling and the spooning I was fine with, even the kissing was fine. I had no problems with keeping it at just that. I might have over done it with the kissing though. He soon freaked out and stated that I was expecting a hookup. I sincerely tried my best to convince him that this was not in anyway a hook up that was not my intent. I was genuinely really interested in getting to know him.   I think here is where I might have come on to strong. I told him, look you haven’t even left yet and I already can’t wait to see you again. That is what came out of my mouth!! That SCREAMED clingy!   That was the best I could come up with, because he was all pent up and ready to jump off the bed and leave.   I think his exact words were. “I’m not into this in and out shit.” Kissing seemed pretty harmless to me. When he suddenly got that upset, my frickin’ heart skipped a beat. He settled down though put his arm back and leg back around me and we finished the movie.

After the movie he wanted to go out on the porch and have a smoke and talk some more. By this time it was close to 6 in the morning. He said he was going to head back home now, he leaned in kissed me goodbye and said he wanted to see me again. Told him I would like to see him again too.

I messaged him online before I went to bed and said it was nice to meet him finally and I had a good time and goodnight.   I never got a return message from him. I saw him online later that next day and told him I had downloaded and watched that movie he had recommended that I see. He replied with asking me what I thought of it and I told him and asked what he was doing later on this evening. I got no response back.

Much much later in the night I messaged him again asking how his night was going I got no response.   At this point I realized something was up. The following day I messaged him and asked him what might have happened after him kissing me goodbye the night before and now and if I did something wrong. I got no response. He was officially not talking to me anymore and I had no clue why!? I told him okay the ball is in your court you want to talk to me that is up to you to decide but it would be nice to know what is wrong or what happened.

This whole cold shoulder thing ATE me up inside like MAD! I just didn’t understand how someone could show so much interest. Especially the kiss goodbye and saying I’d like to see you again. I would never do that to someone especially if I wasn’t interested. My friends say that it was just easier for him that way. That he did it just to slip away quietly and easy without anyone getting their feelings hurt.

Sunday night after my pool tournament I ran into him before leaving Metro. He was apparently with some friends and they knew my friends. If you could see the look on his face when he saw me and sure I had an interesting look on my face too. We made eye contact and I just looked at him and then slowly turned away. I stood back from the circle so no one would introduce us. It was an uncomfortable situation for me and I’m sure for him as well. He had also been talking to a friend of mine online too. My friend was with me that night and he asked him if he was the guy he had been talking to online it was their first time meeting in person. My friend told me that he stopped talking to him online after he heard about my meeting with him.

I came home that night and messaged him.

“That was a really uncomfortable and awkward situation wasn’t it? I stood back so no one would introduce us. I’m sure that won’t be the last time that will happen”

That didn’t yield a response from him either.

I messaged him again.

“Wow is it really that deep and I’m so bad you can't say anything to me at all. That's really messed up. My friends are right I am not the bad person in all this. “

He finally responds back.

“ur right i am.”

My friends and my roommate keep telling me to just forget about it, move on! Let it go.

I am letting it go. It still bothers the piss out of me though.

You wonder why people are so hateful and jaded online, get enough of this crap happen to you and then you begin to understand why.

He said he was totally not into the hook up thing. Neither was I. He did a hook up to me though. No sex, but was still a hook up.

I would still like to be his friend at least. What’s the point of burning bridges? Because this is a small town and we are bound to run into each other again in certain social circles and I don’t want that same uncomfortable situation.

Like I said, wish I could take back how this went. We should have been in a different setting than what we were. Lesson learned perhaps. Besides this exactly wasn’t my idea of a date. Plus another reason why I can be so standoffish to guys and they think I am not interested when I actually probably am. We all get afraid of getting burned.

New photos

2010-09-05T19:50:00.001-04:00

Okay so it isn't underwear. I got this new shirt from adult store above Metro Night Club. I purchased it with my Gift certificate won from the Sunday night pool tournaments. I've won 1st, 2nd and 3rd so far. Granted I would like to win 1st more often. It's all in fun though, gives me something to do on Sundays and puts a close to my weekends. Something that I do for myself before the weekend is over. People generally hit me up online and want to get together. I always tell them I have plans Sunday nights. If they wish to meet me or hangout they can find me there for pool.

I'm not a big fan of their rules of the game. However, there is no entry fee and the pay is more than that "other place". I do like the "other place", cause I know more people there and people know me. Every once in awhile I do switch and go to my old haunt for pool tournament, mostly just for seeing old friends. Okay so the "other place" is Gregs. I like Gregs Night club, they have had pool tournaments there for years and I have went there for years. Thought the change of scenery would be nice and a chance to meet new people. If I do go out just to be going out my choice will still always be Greg's unless of course it's Saturday night.

So interesting I went out last night (Saturday night) to 501, they check your ID at the door. I get to the bar to order my drink (a Coke) and the bartender ask me for my ID. I show him my ID the guy sitting to my right says, "You should take that as a compliment". It is nice I guess when you are asked for ID. Sometimes it's just plain embarrassing. As I walked away I leaned in to the guy to my right and said, "Yeah, considering I am 36".

Last Wednesday I found out that the guy that runs the pool tournaments there had thought I was like 27. I told him I missed the fire pit at Greg's and he is like, "I wouldn't think you were old enough to remember the fire pit". I laughed, "How old you think I am anyway?" I asked him how old he was, turns out he was older than me and here I thought he was younger than me cause he always seemed so quiet, shy and timid. He said I seemed young because of my youthful personality. Well thank you :)

and thank you Kevin for the nice comment on last post.

Spare A Dollar?

2010-08-19T15:33:00.000-04:00

Spare a Dollar? I bet you have been approached with this question before. Whether you are walking in the store or pumping gas into your car.

I moved to Indy when I was 20 and here in the city was the first time I had someone approach me with that question. Of course I would give it to them without question.

I would like to think that I know better now. Unfortunately, I still do it from time to time. My roommate absolutely hates it when I do it or if he was to find out that I did it. Even when I didn’t have that much money of my own I would be giving it away.

Over the course of 14 yrs of being in the city, I probably have given roughly over a hundred dollars or more to strangers.

I’m not sure if it has to do with my up bringing that we didn’t have much growing up. Maybe it has something to do with me just being a softy or I remember living on my own and I didn’t have much myself. I never begged for money though, I would go without until someone realized that I wasn’t doing so well. Then I would get my ass chewed out by family that I didn’t ask for help when I needed it. My pride is just to big.

When I have the money I am happy to help. I’ve been known to get information and pay some ones bill off over the phone with my credit card without them knowing it. Well momentarily anyway, they eventually find out it was me. Generally that is for family members.

As far as giving to strangers asking at the gas station, on the corner or a neighbor, I try my hardest not too. Because you know it is going towards something other than what they are asking it for.

I have done some stupid things when it comes to giving money to strangers. I remember once I was at the local gas station years ago. Not in all that safe of a neighborhood either. Some guy had come up to me after coming out of the gas station; his story was he needed money for bus fare to get back to Chicago. He was with a woman, she was in the car waiting for him, and she had scrubs on and apparently was taking him to the bus station.

His arm was in a cast or a sling and his story seemed somewhat genuine. I recall he needed $32, but I had told him I couldn’t give him all of it. Once again a time I was about to give money when I didn’t have much of my own.

Now this next part is going to sound very stupid of me and I agree looking back on it, it was stupid of me.

I told the guy that I was on my way to the ATM anyway and he could follow me there and I would help him with some of the money. We are now at the ATM and the guy is standing about 10 feet behind me off to the side as I withdraw the money. I told him I was only able to give him $15. He said thank you, I told him, “You’re Welcome” and they went on their way.

Sure you have a few things rolling around in your head as to what could have happened. So don’t really see a point in pointing them out to you.

Many times after that I have given dollars there, change here and there for people claiming they needed gas, food, bus fare, etc. I’ve even given a smoke to people who have asked to bum one off me.

I gave an elderly lady $10 once when she said she needed it for the boarding house when I was walking across the parking lot on my way into the club. Unfortunately she either didn’t make it to the boarding house on time or she didn’t really need it for that to begin with cause when I came out of the bar, there she was walking and pulling her luggage cart behind her.

When I was in Louisville and just leaving to go home from the club a black man asked me for a few dollars to get something to eat. I let him get in my truck and took him to McDonald's. I went through the Drive-thru and he got a couple cheeseburgers and a drink and let him sit in my truck and eat as we talked for a bit. He thanked me, got out and went on his way and I went home.

Before leaving Louisville, there was a neighbor lady that lived just one building down from us. At that time I had just lost my job due to medical reasons. That’s a long story, but I digress.

She came up to me one day and asked if she could get a couple of dollars. She has a young boy, blah blah. She asked where I was going cause I was about to get into my truck and head to the store. She asked if I could help her with groceries and that she would pay me back. So I took her with me to Kroger, we got in the store she grabbed her little basket and I walked with her for awhile while she picked out the things she wanted. I picked up a few things of my own. I told her I was going to go ahead of her and get the stuff I needed and I’d meet her at the check out.

Long story short I paid for the few items I was going after and I paid for her basket full and the items she was carrying. I took her back home she said thank you. I said no problem. She had come up to me one other time when she caught me coming home one afternoon. She wanted money again to pay her babysitter and asked being nosey where I had been. I told her I was just getting home from the unemployment office. She then proceeded to ask about that and she didn’t know I was without work. I told her I couldn’t help her this time, as I thought to myself. (I think the groceries were enough) I knew during all of this I wasn’t going to see the money that I had spent. She was just getting to the point where she was taking advantage of the situation. I don’t mind helping, but when it begins to be obvious that you are asking because you know I will give it to you. I have to struggle on giving it to you. She finally bowed her head and went back home. I was still bothered by it; I really did want to give it to her. That nagging voice in my head..don’t do it, don’t it wouldn’t leave me alone. There are other parts of this story with that neighbor and me giving her money but that would just make this WAY to long. Eventually she stopped coming around.

Guess the whole point of this is I still have a bad habit of giving money to strangers. I think too much about the “what if”. What if they really did need it for what they said it was for? Some of us have a dollars worth of change just lying around anyway we aren’t using. Be that in a jar at home, the console of our car or in between the cushions of our couch.

My roommate found out about me giving the neighbor lady money. He didn’t know I bought her groceries though. He was like; do not tell me how much you gave her! LOL

I’m too nice perhaps, to a point anyway.

Another Year Older

2010-08-09T03:14:00.003-04:00

Monday - A day of the week that falls between Sunday and Tuesday.

Monday's often get a bad rap. Often in songs they are a day of depression, anxiety, or melancholy.

Monday is so close to sounding like "mundane". Which for me yes, Monday's are pretty mundane.

It's the back to work day. It's the fall asleep at your desk day. It's the day that my birthday falls on today.

When my birthday falls on this day and I couldn't tell you last when it did. Seems like my birthday has always fallen on a Friday or Saturday. Of course I know it doesn't cause it changes every year. I can remember it that way cause Birthdays at the end of the week or during the weekend are more memorable or least more fun.

I definitely remember my last post I did on my birthday. I was nervous about making that one. I did it anyway. From the lack of comments on these postings you'd think I don't get traffic at all. But oh on the contrary, I get quite a bit of readers most email me directly or just don't say anything at all. Which I am okay with, I don't mind really. It's been a year since that post. Wow, it went so fast and pretty much a blur. Don't even think I have anything to declare that I learned from being 35. Other than it didn't feel any different from 33 or 34. Hell, I don't feel any different now at 36 than I did when I was 26. I can still get up from the floor without grunting. Only thing changing at this point is the color of my hair.

I actually like the number 36. Sounds sexier to me than 35. I don't mind getting older, I think I have gotten better with age, I think all men get better with age. Okay so that's probably my own personal taste.

The past couple of days people have been asking me what I plan to do on my birthday. Actually, a whole lot of nothing. Sleep! I love to sleep. After all shouldn't we do what we love on our birthday? Granted there are other things that would be nice on my birthday. Sex being one of them. (Damn it! I can't seem to get away from that topic.) Winning the lottery? Of course I would have to play to win. Never been much of a gambler. People offer to take you out for a drink or even dinner on your birthday. I generally don't like people to make a big fuss over me. I do manage to do something for myself on my birthday that's all that concerns me. Buy a gift for myself, as long as I am able to do that I am good. My birthday is when I treat myself, not when others treat me. Yes, yes it is nice to get gifts. I feel more accomplished and happy when I have done for myself.

I'm not much of the cake and ice cream eater so, I can go with out that too. I know others are all for the attention and feel you should do something fabulous on your birthday. As a kid you would probably be totally upset if you didn't get a birthday present. Get a few years on you and some probably feel flattered that someone even remembered their birthday.

My typical gift for myself is underwear. Not that I am in need of new underwear cause I definitely have plenty. I probably have enough to last a couple of months. Would this follow on the line of straight men and their tools, gay men and their underwear, women and their shoes. That's probably being a bit stereotypical though. I like tools and gadgets, that's the computer nerd in me or something. I'm sure that I wouldn't use half of the tools I have been tempted to purchase though; all shiny and heavy.

I cherish all my birthday gifts from others though. I have a pool cue that my Mother gave me for my birthday one year. Now that she is gone it means even more to me. I probably shouldn't use it still, but I do every Sunday.

I have a shirt that I got from a certain friend that I have known for years but never met that I have only worn out in public once. I'm known to wear it to bed sometimes. It's a T-shirt by the way. I haven't wore it out in public very often cause it's a bit suggestive. LOL There is actually pictures of it on my blog, you might be able to figure out which one it is. No it isn't Pilsbury Dough Boy.

I still have an old pocket watch my grandfather gave me when I was a kid. I think it even still functions. It's gold with a train on the front. I'm guessing that thing is like 30 yrs old at this point.

I got my ear pierced when I was 16, a diamond stud. I still have that, but I don't wear an earring anymore. I gave that up 15 yrs ago. Well, actually 16 yrs now.

My father has always given me money for my birthday; I honestly don't recall anything other than that. I'm sure if he did I would still have the item to this day. Maybe I should start holding on to the money. LOL

I feel strange though when my father gives me money, specially considering I am a grown man. He does want me to go hunting with him for my birthday, well sort of for my birthday. Hunting season kicks in soon after my birthday. I've been hunting before. Don't think there is a handgun I haven't shot or rifle for that matter. I'm a lot better with a handgun than a rifle, my Dad is the other way around though.

I really don't need to do anything fabulous, dinner or a movie. Every year I do for myself and I always know that the people around me will wish me happy birthday and of course that one phone call from my sister singing over the phone.

Happy Birthday to you.
Happy Birthday to you.
Happy Birthday Dear... Little Brother.
Happy Birthday to you....

Nice Guy

2010-08-06T07:18:00.000-04:00

I’m beginning to think that I am not going to find a guy to date online. Not that I haven’t, because I have. The last one was actually nice, but that was over 3 yrs ago. However, it turned out that he wasn’t looking for anything serious that or I scared him off. Perhaps it was 2.5 months to soon for me to tell him that I was fallen for him. Heck, I was just expressing how I felt, I couldn’t help it. I said I was, not I had. There is a difference there. During those 2.5 months were some of the best dates I’ve ever had. My roommate agreed that yeah it was too soon to bring that up. LOL

I’ve talked to quite a few guys online that have been really nice. The conversations are nice, but they all eventually lead straight to sex. I don’t mind the sex talk and can be very hard to keep away from it when it’s a guy you are really attracted to. I guess you can say it’s probably not the right guy if he doesn’t want to carry on a decent conversation with you. Some of the best conversations I’ve had and most memorable guys have been those that weren’t all sexual with me right off the bat. If he didn’t like you and you him, then you wouldn’t be talking to begin with. I think the physical attraction is there, no need for the sex talk. Now it’s up to whether your personality can keep that attraction. Of course if that’s if they aren’t just specifically looking for sex.

Think we can all agree to that they can be cute, handsome and sexy as hell, but if they have a shitty attitude or personality it isn’t going to happen.

Come to think of it, the guys that I have ended up dating from online have never led to sex talk right away online before meeting. I’m prone to flirting, which I think is different and not right out sex talk. There have been guys I have talked to for week’s even months before meeting. If you have gained a guys attention for that long and he hasn’t ran away I would like to think something is there. Hell, even if it’s friendship. In the gay world even real friendship can be just as rare as getting a date out of someone.

I’m no stranger to casual sex, we all have our moments. Talking to a nice guy though and it ends up being just sex can be a downer, especially when it ends up being GREAT sex.

I know this started out sounding as if I was specifically online to find dates. I think when you are looking for it you aren’t going to find it. I’m pretty much just going with the flow of things, what ever happens, happens. I have no expectations; I’ve learned not to. You will just end up disappointed sometimes.

I can’t agree with anyone though that says you can’t find a boyfriend or date online, because I have.

I won’t agree with anyone that feels you don’t gain a boyfriend/relationship if you have sex on the first night, because I have.

I don’t agree with anyone that says there aren’t any nice guys online, because there are.

One of them I would like to think is me.

Hygiene

2010-08-05T19:49:00.000-04:00

First I want to defend myself and say, I don’t meet or (hookup) with a lot of people. I tend to be selective in that regard. Dates are rare these days and don't come to quickly for me anyway. Although I think we all have had our share of NSA (No Strings Attached) meetings. Some of the stuff I see comes from photos people send or just put on display. I am also turning 36 this month and over the years I have witnessed some things.

What I don’t understand is that the opposite party isn’t prepared when they agree to meet. Be that for sex, date or what have you. I’m talking personal grooming and hygiene here. Please be clean. By that I mean your body not your offensive ass term for disease free.

I don’t care who I am meeting, friends, family, a date, and casual sex or going out for the night, I always do the personal grooming and hygiene routine. Of course if it’s just friends or family I will just stick to the basics.

Mostly I see it in the younger generation, guys being in their twenties mostly. Not to say I haven’t met or seen guys of an older generation that are lacking in the same area.

First and foremost, take a shower or bathe on some level before meeting someone. Some guys enjoy the natural scent of a guy I get that. I can agree to a certain level.

But areas of interest you might pay attention to detail are:

Nose hair

Belly button – If you have an inny, it shouldn’t have lint or smell like ass.

Dirty nails

Ass & crack – I don’t care if you are a top get in there and clean that pucker.

Nails clipped – I do clip mine but sometimes I might forget to smooth out the rough edges.

Clip toe nails – If you are into feet or ever want to experience foot play, you aren’t going to get a guy to do it with nasty looking toe nails or feet. It’s summer time anyway, if you are into wearing flip flops or sandals during this time you should be taking care of your feet anyway.

Manscaping - This is a matter of taste really. Some like the natural look on a guy. You may also like the natural look yourself. I agree there are some guys that can pull it off. Oral sex isn’t all that fun when you have to stop every 3 seconds to comb the hair off your tongue. By the way having a completely shaved bush but keeping your happy trail is just silly. Also a half circle shaved bald area above your cock and then your bush is silly looking. Quit it!

Douche (Enema) – Bottoms don’t be meeting guys if you aren’t clean. If you are expecting or anticipating sex when meeting I think you might want to squeeze this in. I agree that spontaneity is nice sometimes but not when it’s a planned meeting. Yes sometimes (shit happens) and Tops usually anticipate it anyway but don’t take it for granted.

Deodorant – I think on this one you might want to find out from the other guy what he likes or is into. A guy that likes guy’s armpits probably isn’t going to be too fond of your deodorant. Let’s not try to cake it on or get that clumping affect. A little bit goes a long way sometimes. If you are meeting and just getting right down to sex and you just showered, you can omit the deodorant. It doesn’t taste very good.

Brush and gargle – I have a whole routine I do and probably a bit over board but I don’t care.

1.)    I floss
2.)    I gargle with Listerine
3.)    I use toothpaste and brush my teeth and tongue
4.)    Rinse mouth with water
5.)    I gargle again with Crest 3D white mouthwash

Like I said, probably a bit overboard but just making sure all is fresh. I will also even chew gum afterward; I’m a big fan of kissing and just making sure to anticipate it.

Foreskin – This is another one that is a matter of taste. If you are uncut you should be cleaning it anyway not just for hygiene purposes but for health purposes. Yes I know there are those folks out that that enjoy that natural scent of what lies beneath a guys foreskin. That’s all fine and dandy for them. I personally think it is nasty.

Cologne – I don’t mind it really, as long as it’s not overly offensive. Or if it’s that nasty smelling Axe shit. Many times a guy will pass me in the club and his cologne is just way to strong and must say it doesn’t attract me to him; it makes me want to get away from him. Just because you can’t smell it on yourself doesn’t mean others can’t smell it. You have plenty on trust me; you have just gotten use to the smell.

Sure I have forgotten a few things or there could be some areas that others feel might be important.

Look at it this way, any place on your body you enjoy to be touched, licked, stroked, kissed, caressed, and fondled or where ever a guy might take notice of, you should pay attention too.

Maybe I Shouldn't

2010-08-05T19:39:00.000-04:00

Been thinking lately that maybe I shouldn't be posting details into my sex life here. Probably makes me look bad or something.

Although, I have gotten some good feedback about my blog. Some have said that I am very real about myself and other things. I guess that is lacking when it comes to other guys sometimes. Like it says, I am just doing me. An average down to earth typical male trying to figure it all out. Actually, I am more like an observationalist, (I think that is a word..lol)

Not everything I talk about comes from experience, some of it actually comes from paying attention to other people around me or things I have heard people comment and talk about.

Interesting how this post seems to be about me trying to justify myself and actions. For the most part I really don't care. So I occasionally say things that other people don't seem to talk about. Isn't that what personal blogs tend to be about, other people sharing the details of their life.

Of course I would prefer others to actually meet me and talk to me and find out who I am instead of taking things I might say out of context. I do appreciate those that actually have an interest to take the initiative to come here and read about me. I've given my blog link to a few guys or people in the past and I don't even think they bothered. I know it can't be that exciting sometimes, after all I do mostly rant and ramble on. Pretty much what I am do now actually. lol

Okay, I'm moving on....next!

Cock Sucker!

2010-07-29T20:29:00.002-04:00

Cock Sucking!

I’ve been on both ends of the cock. I am still debating the toss up though as to which one is more exciting. I think I am going to have to go with the giving end on this one.

I can agree that on the receiving end, nothing like getting all up on your haunches and mount a willing mouth as you hold their head or pin their arms behind their head and thrust every bit you got until they gasp for air. Even more exciting when they get into it and you can tell they like it. It slips out and they eagerly try to lasso it with their tongue. Their pumping fist on their own cock gets faster, when you start to breath heavy cause they think you are about to cum. With their free hand they are rubbing all up on your stomach, chest and tweaking your nipples. Oh yeah that is nice I agree.

The filthiest things come out of our mouths when we are getting a great cock sucking. If they aren’t coming out of our mouths it is rattling around in our head.

“Oh fuck yeah, suck that cock boy!” That’s one of great several lines that have been verbalized.   I’ve been known to use, dude, man, and baby. I’ve never felt inclined to utter the word bitch.

Getting a blowjob I tend to be very loud. Like huffing for air, growling, moaning and a few choice spoken words. “Oh fuck, fuck yeah, shit and damn.

Love playing with guys head during the process too. Like rubbing his neck, playing with his ears and occasional pulling of the hair. If he is going to end up being the bottom, then definitely the ass has to get some of my attention as well during a blowjob.

I’m a big nipple fan so no one gets away without me not playing with your nipples as well.

This all seems pretty common though. When I have been on the giving end I have experienced almost all of the above.

On the giving end, depending on the guy and how he goes about it. I can be totally into it and just fucking go into cock worship mode. Being with a lazy guy that just wants to lay there and get head is not my idea of a good time. Some kind of effort involved is more exciting. Want a guy that really fucking enjoys it.   He enjoys it so much that he almost can’t get enough of it. The more he is into it and more eager he is to feed it to me the more eager I want it. Tease and taunt me with the fucker.

I have a gag reflex and I am fine with that. Some guys like for you to have no gag reflex. Whether I am giving or getting I like the gag reflex affect.   Having someone gag on your cock makes you feel it’s too much for them to handle. Boost to your ego. Plus their throat tightens up around it.   That’s all a turn on for me. Me gagging however, I just feel more dominated that way. I definitely try to take as much as I can get though before that happens.

I’m all about a guy holding my head, holding my ears or even forcing my head up and down. I’m totally content with just sucking or being sucked. Even if we don’t do anything else, I am totally satisfied even if I don’t get off.

I can be either submissive or I can be aggressive. Being aggressive can be the most fun sometimes. Getting the guy to the edge then stopping. Stopping him from stroking his cock and not let him play with himself. Even tying him up and just work him over constantly to the edge and stopping. Getting him to the growling and “oh fuck” stage.

That brink when he is so eager to touch you. You let him go and he fucking grabs hold of you and pulls you up to shove his tongue in your mouth, then pushing you back down on his cock. Damn, I get like that too, guy giving me head so good that I just want to fucking kiss him. It’s almost like instinct for some reason.

When a guy is on his back, I’m going to give the full service treatment. Mostly cause I enjoy the hell out of it. No spot goes without not being licked or sucked. We are talking neck, armpits, nipples, legs, feet, nuts, cock, taint and ass. My goal is to make them squirm and I highly enjoy watching them squirm. It’s just like fucking; if we aren’t breaking a sweat during this cock sucking then we aren’t doing something right.

Now after all that is said and done, of course, this generally only happens if the chemistry is good. When I click with someone sexually, it’s on!

This ended up more timid than normally anticipated. I still left quite a bit out =P

Big Ham

2010-07-29T05:44:00.000-04:00

No this isn't the cock sucking post. LOL

I've seen this guy in several places across the net. I've seen him on Xtube, Dudesnude, BigMuscle and I think, but not certain Cam4. Cam4 I haven't been to in awhile. It gives me a serious case of blue-balls.

I have totally thought this guy was adorable for years. He is so playful and has a variety of cute facial expressions. He's the kind of guy that probably giggles and laughs when he cums. LOL

He really reminds me of my FB in Louisville just not as short. Totally laid-back, playful and just really enjoys being played with. Those gray temples just add to the sexiness. He may not be ripped or lean or anything like that. Just an average looking bulky kind of muscled under toned guy. His personality just really comes out when I have seen him on camera. According to the review guess I'm not the only one who thinks he's playful.

This link is NSFW, but watching him you will see what I am talking about. He is a total Ham!

Video Link

Vulgar

2010-07-28T23:53:00.001-04:00

I'm debating whether or not to do a post about cock sucking. It got rolling around in my head last night when I was clicking through some of my frequently visited sites. Another cause, not like I get very much male to male sexual contact that often. I have a lot of pent-up oral fixated tension sort of speak.

I haven't really been all that sexually explicit or vulgar in my blog before. Not that I am not a big ole' perv. cause I definitely have my moments. When it comes to innuendo I have a hard time holding my tongue.

With the right guy, I am highly orally fixated. This post is just a precursor as to what's to come. I'm just giving a warning..

Weekend Odds and Ends

2010-07-27T03:17:00.004-04:00

Odds and Ends should probably be something short and sweet. I don't think this is going to be all that short and sweet.

I would start with Friday night, since that is pretty much the start of the weekend. However, I didn't do anything Friday evening. I stayed home, watched television and went to bed. I had thought about going out but my nights out usually just end up in a waste of gas really and a $2 soda. I think for the most part me going out is just so I can be seen every once in awhile. You know, you still have to let the locals know you exist. Granted I am online, but from my observations of going out. Those that are online are just that, those that are online and those at the clubs are those at the club. Only a hand full of those I see online, I hardly see out. They are at home online doing the usual hookup sites. I think some see online as being an easier outlet to meet people or at least strike up conversation. Assuming of course people aren't being dickheads and respond back.

I think I can agree that online is easier for conversation but it's also easy for others to be very evasive. Although being out at the club people can be the same way. Which I think is rude on both accounts, even more so face to face.

Saturday night I did the usual. I Geared up (showered and shaved) Opted for contacts instead of my glasses and wearing my favorite shirt.

Getting off topic real quick here. Speaking of shaving, shaved my ass during the Saturday night shower, which I haven't done in a long time. Trimming yes, shaving it rarely ever these days. I am not doing that again, guess you don't do it for awhile and you forget why you stopped doing it to begin with or the reason didn't seem all that bad. Wrong! Granted bumps are to be expected when shaving your shit, but just not esthetically pleasing to look at the day after. I'll stick to trimming.

So back to donning my favorite shirt and heading out Saturday night. Greg's is first on the list, which generally is NOT the place to be on Saturday nights, but they were having their 30th anniversary with guest porn star Johnny Hazard.

He's cute, I'll give him that. He has a really nice upper body (which you can't see here). He has a skinny lower half though. Who am I to talk right. LOL He seemed like a sweetheart of a guy and charismatic on stage. If you going to work out your upper body, you should work out your lower half too. He definitely is leaner and smaller of a guy in person that I thought he would be. He had a tiny butt, nothing wrong with that really (I'd still lick it). All and all he was cute, adorable face and loved the part in his hair. Don't see that much these days. Gosh, I haven't had that short school boy collegiate looking part in my hair since grade school. He pulls it off though.   After he was done and I finished my soda I left Greg's. The crowd was beginning to look to pretty for me. By that I mean, preppy, trendy, high maintenance; that sort of thing.

Off to 501 Eagle , which is the place to be on Saturday nights, well that or Talbott Street . I don't do Talbott Street, it goes back to that high maintenance thing again. Plus, the crowd is younger (twinks). I have been there a few times. But generally not worth my money in cover to see drunk bitchy twinks with their plucked eyebrows, makeup foundation and flip-flops.

Years ago I used to be afraid to go to 501. 501 Eagle is the Leather, Bear, Levi and I would say muscle but I haven't seen much muscle floating around in there, kinda bar. It also tends to be more cruisy than the other places. It's probably the only place I have ever been hit on. Probably the only place where people actually have the balls to approach you.   I begin to wonder sometimes if I intimidate people or I'm unattractive or something, cause I never get hit on. Maybe it goes back as far as high school when I eventually found out by my Senior year that people always thought I was angry. Of course I also heard people thought I was a stuck up rich kid. Which I thought was far from the truth and utterly hilarious.

When I am out I try to keep a friendly look on my face when I am conscious of it of course. I can be a bit timid when I am approached, mainly cause it's something I am not quite sure how to handle. Once you get to know me and I open up I am quite the opposite.

I've never been really good at the whole cruising thing. I usually don't make eye contact which can be my downfall. I tend to watch from a distance and when anyone gets close my eyes hit the floor. Even in public I am the same way. I also almost never approach anyone first.

These days I am not afraid to walk into 501 by myself anymore. Mostly cause 501 isn't what it use to be in it's prime. Anyone that has been here long enough would probably know what I mean. It's not as dark and not quite as sleazy. Still a bit sleazy yes, you can still catch someone getting fucked in a dark corner or a guy giving head to a few guys while onlookers swig their beer and pretend to play with change in their pocket.

I was upstairs when I got hit on twice. First by a slim lean drunk man. Which might have been cute if he wasn't already so drunk. His line was, "Do I know you?" I replied with, "I'm not sure". Of course I don't consider this to be a come on. Cause after that I noticed he was doing that to randomly selected people. He caught up with me again and asked, "What are you into?" Damn, I can't escape this line. If I have heard it once I have heard it a thousand times online, I replied with "Nothing". Then in a huff he said, "Damn" and walked away.   Sorry you can be cute as hell, but if you are drunk I am not interested. I was not mean or snotty to him by any means. My responses were friendly in manner.

Still upstairs out of my side view I realize that a guy is glancing at me from time to time as he tries to casually play it off that him and his friends aren't talking about me. You know, one thinks that I am cute or whatever and his group of friends are trying to coax him into talking to me or he is asking them what they think as they do that look your way but not trying to look your way so they can see who he is talking about. Cute. I know I have done this a few times while out with my friend Brian. You know you try to be nonchalant about it, but people can tell you are doing it. Normally I would get all coy about the fact that someone has taken notice of me and freak out and begin to sweat. Like I said I am not good at this stuff. When you have met your first boyfriend at 20 yrs old thru a Star News personal ad and was roughly your first true gay experience with a guy and had never been out up until that point, then after 5.5 yrs ended up in another relationship for another 2-3 yrs one doesn't really get a chance to experience this kind of stuff. At 35 yrs old I still haven't grasped the whole cruising and being approached in a bar. My single gay existence has been mostly online. Which just means I need to get out more.

So I stand my ground though, trying not to seem as if I know he is looking at me. I turn one way and turn back another and before I know it he is making a bee-line for me between people. What really gets me nervous is the fact that the guy is actually good looking. I'm use to drunks and way older men hitting on me. Mind you I don't mind older men. But when you are my grandfathers age that's another story.

One annoying thing about meeting someone in a club, the fucking loud ass music. I am not a loud talker and I am not one to yell. So if you talk to me in the bar be prepared to have me talk into your ear and not talk loudly at your face.

He ask me, "How are you doing?" I say "I'm doing alright." He then states his name is "Tyler". I give him my name in return. He ask me if I come here often I say no not that often. Which I really don't, I probably go out maybe 2 times a month. This all seems pretty typical conversation. Where you from and all that jazz. Did I come alone, am I single. Of course I ask who he came with as well, cause you never know one of those people could have been his boyfriend and that is a no-no with me. After I ask who he was here with, he told me he just came with friends, I had said, as I laughed, "just checking". Now during all this he is just all smiles. He then tells me,"we are going to go get another drink." He joined his friends went downstairs to get their drinks.   Now I was a bit confused at that point. Did that mean, we are going after drinks and he was coming back? Or should I have taken the dominant role in the conversation and said, yeah I could use a drink myself, mind if I tag along. Hell I don't know. Or was this the cue that during that Q & A session he found out all he needed to know and wasn't interested.

I racked my brain trying to figure out what I might have said that might have lost his interest. Maybe he didn't, perhaps he was like me and when I am with friends I am not going to blow them off and spend the rest of the night with some guy. If I come with friends I make it an appoint to leave with the people I came with. It's a courtesy thing. Unless the people I came with are coaxing me on, Go go talk with him be with him and they go off and do their own thing.

Anyway, I stuck around lingering from the upstairs to the downstairs and every once in awhile Tyler and I would pass each other and he would be all smiles and I would smile back. I left eventually cause he never did come back to talk to me again, but from his body language after our conversation I think he wanted to continue talking to me but he was with his friends and wanted to stick with them. I can respect that. I was just happy that for once going out someone actually had the balls to approach me. So that was Saturday night.

Sunday night is my night to play in pool tournament at Metro Nightclub. Sorry no link on that one. Their website doesn't seem to be working or they just don't have one anymore.

Metro not really my place to go. Never really has been. I recently started going back this month. I hadn't stepped in that place since probably 1999. Metro has no dance floor anymore for starters. It's really narrow front bar makes for uncomfortable personal space issues. (for me anyway) Once again in it's prime I would say it was a candidate to be on the list of the bars you would hop to before the night was over. Not sure that is the case anymore. Metro now seems a bit to uptight for me. I am however an avid pool player have been since I was 16 and I strictly go for the pool tournament plus it currently pays out more than the tournament at Greg's which I had been going to for years. I'd like to play in both of them but the time frames conflict with each other. So that is a no go. Sundays tend to be long nights for me, for a Sunday anyway. The tournament usually runs late. Leaving me getting home somewhere around after midnight. So even though the money is better, sure it won't be long that I will end up back at my usual haunt for pool. It's been fun and interesting. I'm still arguing though the rules they have are fucked up. I still haven't won first place yet (which is rare). Like I said some fucked up old school rules.

So that's my weekend. Well I did have a guy come and meet me for a drink while I was at Metro for the pool tournament. He even stated before coming that he was tired but would come anyway cause he wanted to meet me. Which I thought was nice, most guys don't go that extra mile. Some should do that more often, tells more about you than you might think. I thanked him for coming and I appreciated it. He set the bar pretty high at that point. It was a casual meeting, I was with my friend Brian at the time too. This one did stick around to the end. Brian and I hugged goodbye and he left. I walked with the new guy to his car, it was nice to meet you and that whole bit. Should do it again sometime and that sort of thing. We "fucked" the handshake part and hugged goodbye as well. The priority there has ended up friendship for now.

Perhaps another weekend I will have a story of a certain blondish 5'9 guy. LOL Who by the way intimidates the hell out of me...and would totally make me sweat. I say this so candidly cause I know he comes here and probably end up reading this. haha. Of course, I think I might keep that story to myself.

**edit** see told ya he would read it..He had to message me & correct my grammar . LMAO

Btw. I purchased Gun Oil Silicone based lube. If you haven't tried it, I think it's awesome. I always thought you couldn't use it with condoms. However, I discovered that you can. Originally Silicone based lube would stain your sheets. Apparently this new hybrid Gun Oil does not. The downside is I can't use it with my Fleshjack. It will destroy it. WET lube literally sucks with my Fleshjack cause it keeps drying out so much.

Hip Cellphone

2010-07-21T16:13:00.000-04:00

Okay I don't recall where I read this at, I apologize. Somewhere, someone and by someone I mean some gay queen ( I'm thinking it was over at Dlisted), pointed out that it was hideous for gay men to have their cellphone attached to their hip.

First off, Bite Me!

Second my phone is a smartphone and I am not shoving that fucker in my pocket when I go out. I have car keys, chapstick, change, gum and sometimes when going to the bar I carry my Zippo and my pack of cigarettes in my pocket. Leaving no room for my phone.

So apparently by gay men standards this is not trendy to be sporting a cellphone on your hip. Supposedly, this is something a straight man would do, like I give a fuck.

Granted, people are entitled to their opinion and so am I.

I am not carrying my $400 phone in my pocket for the screen to get scratched or in my back pocket, just to sit on it and crack the screen. I'd like to keep the radiation next to my nuts at a minimum.

I guess if I was having its lighted display glaring back at me, as I held on to it like some cellphone deprived junkie in the bar and just oblivious to everyone around me, I guess I wouldn't have none of those problems.

If I start looking like this, then yeah we have a problem. =P

Over It

2010-07-14T18:00:00.004-04:00

Yes, the title is a sign of a rant and whine session. Stereotypical rant at that.

Okay I'm done with the men for the rest of this week. Have enough bad experiences in a few days, just kind of lose all desire to even be online. For me it only takes one bad one to ruin my whole online experience for the day.

I never understood why it was that guys who live thousands of miles away are totally into me, chatting, wanting to get to know me. Guys I would totally date. The local ones however, who in comparison aren't even half the kind of men won't give me the time of day. Or is it that non-local guys seem more appealing to them or exotic.

Just plain exhausting to try to talk to half of these fuckers. I've had a bad week anyway. I dug up an old skeleton from 3 yrs ago and it got me no where. which I totally know I shouldn't have done. Should have let sleeping dogs lie on that one.

I also apparently pissed off my Ex. One might think that is a good thing. I happen to be friends with all my Ex's, granted I only have two. But, my intentions are never to upset anyone. That's one of the problems that I've always had, I think way to much about what others think of me.

I'm all kinds of things this week, half of it being I'm sexually frustrated. The other half probably being stressed about this whole trying to gain weight issue.
Plus, I could use more social interaction with people. (more friends)

You can always tell the ones that don't get out much. You meet up with them and they talk, talk, talk. Starved for conversation. I get like that when I haven't seen friends in awhile or someone that I have been waiting to see. It really came apparent to me when I was riding in my Ex's car lately and he was just talking a mile a minute. I smiled a bit inside and realized I do the same thing. I catch myself doing it sometimes. When you are trying to squeeze all you can in to one conversation like it's going to be the last time you are going to see them again. LOL

I don't think I have done very well approaching people online lately anyway. My ice breakers for chat has totally sucked. Might have rubbed people the wrong way. My sense of humor came off the wrong way. =\

People have been downright assholes lately. Perhaps it's that time of the month. I've just been watching TV and going to bed early these days. (sorry Meat) lol

Oh My

2010-07-12T08:55:00.001-04:00

Oh My: Gin Wigmore

Heard this song from "Hung" a Series on HBO. Sunday nights 10PM. Loved the beat and voice. Naturally I had to hunt this song down.

And who wouldn't like a show about a big cocked man whore! LOL

Despicable Me

2010-07-09T06:58:00.000-04:00

This is going to be Hilarious! =P

Oh Piss

2010-07-06T10:40:00.002-04:00

It's a toss up. Piss & Vinegar underwear or these Andrew Christian underwear.

Wow! Aren't these sexy looking? I'm a big fan of contrasting colors.

Just so we are clear this is not me wearing these. I'm just showing what the potential underwear purchase looks like first. Besides, I have more hair on my legs than that...lol

Weight Update

2010-07-06T10:16:00.004-04:00

So last time I mentioned the weight gain process I was at 12.4 lbs. When I first started talking about this process back on the June 1st post I was at 2 lbs. The goal is to add 25 lbs of more weight. (total).

I am now up 17lbs. Pretty much the first process put more body fat on me, this second process is to put more lean muscle mass on me. Doctor has switched up the drugs since the first one had bad affects, even though it did work. I could not continue taking it. This new one doesn't seem to have any side effects that I have noticed so far. However, it does have bad affects on my liver. Considering the low dosage and the short period of time I will be taking it, it shouldn't be a problem. I am still taking precautions though by trying to eat/drink things that will help detoxify my liver.

I'll have to celebrate at the end of my goal by buying a new pair of new underwear that just came on the market not to long ago which I think is so tongue in cheek :)

Full of "Piss & Vinegar"

Look out "Men's Underwear Blog" I'll be entering those underwear contest you have from time to time. LOL

At 18

2010-06-17T00:31:00.000-04:00

Looky what I found!

Here I be at 18 yrs old. Wow 17 yrs ago.

Changing

2010-06-12T18:18:00.000-04:00

Well I am now 12.4 pounds heavier than I use to be. Interesting how much of a change 12 pounds can make. My face has filled out, My tummy is noticeably bigger, my legs are thicker and my ass is rounder :)

Probably by the end of August I'll look like a different person. Cause soon I am going to be having dental work done to correct my smile as well. Toddy is getting an overhaul! I would imagine by the end of August I would have also gained more weight too.

The next course of action is to begin working out again. So I can tone back up and gain a bit of muscle mass. The extra body fat I have gained as done we wonders so far.

Also going to need a new set of specs. (glasses) Need updated set, in prescription and aesthetically too of course.

Alejandro Video Premiere

2010-06-08T13:30:00.002-04:00

Lady Gaga New Video for "Alejandro"

I watched this and the first thing that came to mind was "Madonna"
The video is quite provocative and has some religious visuals that I'm sure will upset some of the masses.

Watch Lady Gaga Video Alejandro Premiere June 8th

BED

2010-06-03T16:19:00.000-04:00

Blanche Elizabeth Devereaux

Eat Boy Eat!

2010-06-01T13:02:00.000-04:00

Lord knows I have been skinny for years. As you can see from previous postings that I have done of my torso/underwear shots.

I have about a 28" waist actually. But I still manage to wear a 30 inseam jean, with the help of a belt and an always tucked in wife beater.

I've had a few Doctors that have told me that I should put on some weight. I've even had one tell me, to just plain shut up and stop complaining cause, he has to tell most of his patients to lose weight.

I've always been fairly toned and muscled.   I really can't pack on the muscle growth, was told my small body frame couldn't handle much muscle mass. Someone once said, "Well, you are skinny, but you are a muscled skinny!" Still not sure if that was a good response or not.

There are always the negative folks. You are so skinny you need to EAT! Then there are some that like the skinny guys.

Granted, as I have gotten older I have leaned out even more and over the course of the last 3 yrs I have lost some muscle tone. Most noticeably in my face. My Dad has a real lean face too. You know that sunken in cheek look. No mistaken we are father and son.

Whole hardheartedly though I am admitting that I look a bit unhealthy skinny. I've always been self-conscious about my body. In spite of the fact that I post and take so many pictures of my lower torso you would think I am obsessed with my body or something. It's actually the opposite. Out in public, you'd probably never get me to take off my shirt. I barely wear short sleeve shirts, just so I don't have to show my arms.

As far as my health? I've perfectly healthy the Doctor says. In regards to cholesterol, blood sugar, yadda yadda and all that other blood work they always do.   Just that I am underweight.

My Doctor did give me some stuff that was suppose to increase my appetite and make me eat. However, he did say it was going to taste nasty as shit! The tip was that I should chase it with Peanut Butter Cups. Now I am only suppose to take 1 teaspoon of this a day. Well, after my last visit with him, I told him that I still hadn't taken that crap yet. He frowned at me of course and asked why not. I told him that I was worried about the side effects that I read.    Which included, low sex drive, inability to maintain erection during intercourse, etc. Considering I don't have much sex anyway and not that I have a boyfriend or anything so not terribly sure why I was concerned about this, but I was.

Well I broke down, I started taking that crap. It's name will remain nameless. I can tell you that it did work! Boy does it work!

See I thought it was going to make me like hungry hungry, that stomach growling all the time kinda hungry. No! It just made me CRAVE food! I wanted to stick everything and anything in my mouth that I could. I couldn't get enough to EAT!

BUT! my body wasn't use to consuming this much food. Obviously! I wouldn't be so full that I would get sick, I would just feel so bloated and miserable. OH! The heartburn! The heartburn has been awful! Like now that I am eating all this food my stomach is producing all this extra acid. Another downfall though? Constipation!!

So this is a lot of TMI. I stopped taking the stuff after a week though. I was beginning to freak out and felt way over stuffed. Still have yet to discuss this experience with my Doctor, but maybe it was just my bodies way of adjusting to the change of the large amount of food I had suddenly began eating everyday.

Even though I have been off it for a week. I am still very addicted to eating food. Or I still have the craving to eat. Did it work though? I gained 2 pounds and did gain weight in my face. Close friends already noticed in just the week that I had taken it.

If I stop taking it I have to be off it for 2 weeks before I can go back on it again. But right now I am just waiting until I can get a chance for a Dr. Appointment before I ask if he thinks it's alright for me to continue on. Cause there are other concerns that I was having as well.

To give you an idea. I was basically eating double my regular portion sizes. Then a half hour later I would be hungry again and again. I was eating around the clock!!

The heartburn? I love spicy food and boy I was eating a lot of it and TUMS. LOL

Summer Nights

2010-05-14T22:35:00.004-04:00

Summer is nearing. Nights are cool but still warm enough to go for nice walks or drive with the windows down. Even laying in bed naked on cool sheets with the windows open, breeze blowing in.

One thing I like to do is take a drive at night wandering around the back roads, with the windows down and music going. Cool summer breeze blowing in, helps me relax. Also gets me to thinking about my life. Where I have been, where I am going and what I have done.

These moments are usually my peaceful and carefree moments. I'm at ease and content when I get in these moods to drive around.

Summer nights tend to put me in these moods. I've been known to drive for miles for no apparent reason just so I can stay as far away as possible from heavy traffic and city lights. Totally a waste of gas, in these moments I really don't care. Sometimes I would drive all the way to the edge of another city and then back just so I can enjoy the long dark highway.

There are other times where I want to take long slow walks at night and enjoy the night air. To have someone accompany me. Perhaps a date. I love these kinds of dates. Specially when it's with someone that you have really made a connection with. Talk and walk for hours, not noticing the time, the distance or the beginning soreness of your legs.

I love summer. I love it best at night. Maybe because I am a summer baby, August in fact. Isn't August suppose to be the hottest month of the summer. I never cared to much for Air conditioning either. Although, I couldn't tell you if I was born during the day or at night.

Giving my sleeping habits, my time of alertness and that I am not so much of a morning person. I'm gathering I was born on a nice summer night.

Bye bye Facebook

2010-05-01T04:11:00.006-04:00

**Edit** -Upon deactivating your account.-- I recently searched on how to permanently delete my account. I was successful.

"Hi Todd,

We have received a request to permanently delete your account. Your account has been deactivated from the site and will be permanently deleted within 14 days."

Seems I am not the only one recently via News on Facebooks Privacy issues.

Upon removing your account Facebook wants to know the reason and to explain.

I checked "I found it no longer useful". Explanation.

"Just like Myspace. Just another popularity contest. No point in connecting with old friends or high school people. If you didn't talk them then, you aren't going to talk to them now. Or if they aren't already in your life, then why do they need to be in your life now."

Was just as I suspected, all these people wanting to add you as a friend. Oh Oh I went to school with him. Let's add him! What the hell! You didn't talk to me then and after adding me you still didn't talk to me. What the fuck is the point.

Just a bunch of people playing mafia games, farming games and whatever else that gains them points, coins, fruits, and vegetables. Then they send you all kinds of updates and messages. Oh such and such found used parts or bunnies or some shit. Help them find the rest! Annoying and useless shit. Bitch find your gold coins yourself.

On top of that, you have people digging up old shit. Pictures i.e. that you haven't seen in 20 yrs. Hell if I wanted to see those or to even share them with everybody else I would have put them on there myself. Hate people tagging me in photos.

Besides, I found out most of the people I went to school with ended up being a bunch of holier than thous that are squeamish about certain things and have possibly taken offense to some of the things I post. We're adults, take your head out of your ass!

Stink Bitch Baby!

2010-04-23T18:13:00.000-04:00

iTag

2010-04-22T21:06:00.002-04:00

Okay this is just to cool. I love technology :)

iTag <---- click here

Touchy Feely

2010-04-21T23:39:00.006-04:00

PDA - Public Display of Affection. Either you are okay with it or your not. I myself, not very crazy about it. Perhaps, in doses and with someone that I have been in RELATIONSHIP with for awhile.

One of the particular moments of PDA that makes me uncomfortable is when it is in a nightclub or bar. Which usually turns out to be with some strange person you hardly know or just met.

I think after all these years I have finally discovered what my true pet peeve is. Guys who invade your personal space. Drunk or not drunk, there are certain body languages one has to pick up on or social cues that your actions are making the other person uncomfortable.

Cute, ugly, fat, old, thin, whatever! I don't care. Bothers me to no end.

Granted I know the clubs can be loud and you have to lean in to someones ear to speak so they hear you. This can still be done without coming on to strong with the hands and the body pressing.

This type of situation has happened to me countless times. Guys talking to you and feels he has to touch you, rub your back, try to grab your hand and hold hands with you. Kiss on your neck, play with your hair or even slide their hand into nether regions of your pants. You know that is all fine and dandy, but there is a time and place. I am not about to do it in the club.

Perhaps I am just a prude. But if a guy is all touchy feely when he is drunk or sober when you meet him. You have to think about the long term here. Is this really a guy you want to be around all the time when you go out. Specially, if he is just a friend.

I have had 2 long term relationships and have been out the bars many times in a relationship and not once do I remember being all over each inside the club.

I have an Ex, when he would get drunk he would be so horned up and just look at me like he was going to eat me alive! LOL Never once did we put on a show in the bar. When we got home though, that was different.

See recently, I had a guy approach me who thought I was cute, hot, whatever. He was all over me like hair on soap. I was so uncomfortable but, putting on a good front about it. I could tell from the surrounding people watching that they could see I wasn't all that comfortable. I was leaning back so far to try and keep a comfortable distance from this guy my back was beginning to hurt. The bar was far from being warm and the strain of it all was also making me start to sweat it was almost a workout to maintain my personal space.

Was the guy cute? Yes, he was attractive. Was he drunk? Yes he was.

There are 2 rules I go by when going out.

1. I don't pick up drunk guys.
2. I am not making out with you in a bar.

First one is just out of respect. Also a drunk person is not legally consensual for sex. Plus, I am not that desperate and I take someone that is drunk telling me I am hot with a grain of salt.

The second one, because if I made out with everyone that came on to me. Then you get pegged as the bar slut who every night is sucking face with a new guy ever Saturday night. There is one in every club and I have known a few. That is not the reputation I want for myself.

If the guy you saw several times making out with different guys every other weekend came up to you at the bar and asked you out or wanted to dance, would you? Probably not.

To each their own though. I'm not saying don't do it or you shouldn't be doing it. I'm just saying it's not for me inside the club with someone I just met.

Yes

2010-04-16T01:21:00.001-04:00

Big Shoulder Broad

2010-04-12T23:11:00.005-04:00

Dixie Carter passed away over the weekend. Saturday at the age of 70.

I remember her most from "Designing Women". Numerous times this series has had me rolling laughing.

They have finally begun to release the series on DVD. I myself so far have only managed to get a hold of season 1.

I remember an episode where Julie Sugarbaker, the character Dixie carter played and Mary Jo, the character that Annie Pots played. Where they did a play portraying big shoulder broads, Joan Crawford and Bette Davis. Wish I was able to find a clip from that episode. Julia had said she had always felt she aspired to the likes of these big shoulder broads. I think her character had already achieved that.

Thought I would post a few favorite clips.

Dixie Carter ( 1939 - 2010 )

Droid

2010-04-07T21:47:00.003-04:00

New Cell phone! Which isn't bad. Guess I can't argue with free. About time T-Mobile decided to give me a free $400+ phone. Samsung Behold II. Which is an Android phone. Not sure if that is anything special or not.

So I have a touchscreen phone, not quite what it's cracked up to be. Hitting the right buttons accurately can be rather annoying. No damn it! not that button. (try again). Arrgh..god-damn-mutha-fuckin-piece of shit..This button!! Damn it I need smaller fingers. Guess I would be in a world of trouble if I was trying to tap this thing with my cock. (I kid)

All and all I like the fact that it has 5.0 Mega pixel camera w/flash. It still plays MP3's and I can utilize my home wireless network to surf the net, check my Gmail and use the Google voice app to make phone calls.

Texting is still going to take some getting use to.

I'm a little Drunk...

2010-03-23T11:43:00.002-04:00

and I Need You Now :)

Now for a bit of trivia.

Did you know the female singer in this video is the Daughter of Linda Davis from this Duet with Reba McEntire :)

Hairy or Smooth

2010-03-17T21:51:00.005-04:00

Whether it be hairy or smooth this is just a hot looking ass!
(my opinion of course)

Nice thick thighs. Mercy.

Fever

2010-03-17T12:04:00.007-04:00

Isn't he ADORABLE! =)
I wonder if he has a fuzzy torso...mmm!

click image for a larger look-n-see

There he goes

My baby walks so slow
Sexual tic-tac-toe
Yeah I know we both know
It isn't time, no
But could you be m-mine?

We'll never get too far
Just you, me and the bar
Silly ménage à trois, sometimes
Would you be m-mine?
Would you be m-mine?
Would you be m-mine?

Oh baby, light's on
But you're mom's not home
I'm sick of laying down alone, hey
With this fever, fever, yeah
My one and own
I wanna get you alone
Give you fever, fever, yeah

There it goes
You're still my soul and so
'Cause, sweetheart
No-no-nobody a-kno-kno-knows me
Or can find me, ooh
Time to be m-mine, mine

Let's get inside your car
Just you, me and the stars
Kind of ménage à trois, sometimes
Would you be m-mine?
Would you be m-mine?
Would you be m-mine?

Oh baby, light's on
But you're mom's not home
I'm sick of laying down alone, hey
With this fever, fever, yeah
My one and own
I wanna get you alone
Give you fever, fever, yeah

Yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah
Yeah yeah yeah
Oh baby oh baby oh baby oh baby you're mine
Baby you're mine, mine, you're mine

Oh baby, light's on
But you're mom's not home
I'm sick of laying down alone
With this fever, fever, yeah
My one and own
I wanna get you alone
I got this fever and I can't sweat it out

Oh baby light's on
But you're mom's not home
I'm sick of laying down alone
With this fever, fever, yeah
My one and own
I wanna get you alone
Yeah give you fever, fever yeah

Give you my f-f-fever my f-fever
Give you my f-f-fever my f-fever
Give you fever, fever, yeah
Give you fever, fever, yeah

Lyrics by: Lady Gaga

Fucked Up

2010-03-17T10:41:00.003-04:00

Okay Indiana has some fucked up weather.

I mean come on! Close to 70 on Friday and then Snow 2 days later.

I'm done with the snow. Please, please make it go away.

New Underwear Again.

2010-03-16T14:28:00.006-04:00

Not liking these so much. For starters they aren't small enough in the leg. Of course you aren't seeing that part. I need extra small!!! I'll probably be giving these away =\

"Wrap your inches in our Ginches"

Think I should have trimmed some more...aaah fuck it.

Pink Truck go Bye-bye

2010-03-04T04:45:00.006-05:00

I haven't posted much since being back in Indianapolis. It's been crazy and hectic.

Let's see,
I've used up all my money in my bank account to get here.
Officially in debt with my bank. (Damn those bank fees)
I was in the emergency room for being dehydrated and on I-V
Took forever to get my health insurance setup (some of it is still pending)
Unable to get my Kentucky Unemployment transferred.
Top it all off, bastards came and took my truck away.

1997 Dodge Dakota

They even have it back on their website already for resale

Not sure how they accomplished that so fast considering.

For starters, it's way over priced for what it's worth. It does not have a Cassette player in it you idiots. (unless they took out the stereo I put in it.) Which was able to play WMA and MP3's plus the I-plug which was capable of hooking up an MP3 player.

It wouldn't have had a spare tire if it wasn't for me either. Since, when I got it they never gave me one.

Wouldn't have had a new serpentine belt, water pump, heater core and fixed radiator leak if it wasn't for me either.

I know they haven't fixed the big stuff yet. It needed upper and lower ball joints and inner tie rods. They put new tires on it. (whoopie-do! within 2 weeks this bitch will be pulling to the right and the tires will wear down like mad having to replace them every month.) Making the alignment fuck up constantly. Hell it needed that evidently when I bought it.

It has a horrendous popping noise coming from the back wheels when turning the wheel in reverse during the summer months. (hot and dry) Which is probably a rear wheel differential oil leak, or bad bearings.

It has issues when it rains too. I won't go into that. All and all I wouldn't recommend driving this vehicle long distances or attempting to have it in 4 Wheel drive for to long.

So basically my return to Indy has been a bit rough. But I am back now, where I want to be. Even if it does mean making a new start. New job (soon I hope) and new set of wheels (eventually). Nothing bad ever last forever. Besides, without the bad we would never know when the happy times are.

I will miss my truck though. Definitely one of a kind. If you saw it, knew it was me. Only one like it that I saw. Was kind of my trademark there for awhile. Even if it did have a fucked up gay-ass color. I have a souvenir though, I still have the keys fuckers!!

Lovin' This Song

2010-03-03T05:16:00.005-05:00

(might want to pause music player before clicking this)

(Yes, yes I have felt this way)

Here I go (Move) again

2009-12-26T12:07:00.003-05:00

Back to Indy I go today :)

Knew this day was gonna come eventually. Kind of sudden though, not sure I am gonna have time to say good-bye to those that I have become friends with here in Louisville. That part sucks. I'll at least make some phone calls before I leave town.

Soooo long Kentucky!

Techno Christmas

2009-12-15T16:28:00.001-05:00

I can just imagine the light bill!!

Bad Romance

2009-11-19T12:56:00.003-05:00

Lady GaGa - Bad Romance
Album : Fame Monster - 8 Tracks.

This song is growing on me =\ Pretty cool video. Futuristic Russian Bath house (according to the behind the scenes footage)